Freedom Love Obsession

Blackmail

⚠️Warning : Suicidal and depressed thoughts, suicide attempt, slightly mature content (🔞)

Also i hope you guys understand that this story is dark and toxic. There will be limited amount of fluffy scenes. So please read it only if you are comfortable otherwise you can skip it. 🙏 

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Joe's POV : 

Darkness.. Everything is dark here. I have been walking for a long time and I have no idea where I am. All I know is that if I stop, their voices will come back to me. I am constantly walking to save myself from them. I am tired and thirsty but here there is nothing but darkness. Finally, exhausted, I fell to my knees on the floor. 

'Joe I'm already in love with someone else' 'He doesn't love you' 'You're useless' 'Chay will never be yours' 'He's happy with that other person and look they're in each other's arms' Their voice came to my ears again. Hearing last sentence I raised my head and fell on my back looking at the scene in front of me. Chay My Chay is sleeping on the bed with someone on top of him. I can't see the person's face because he buried his face in Chay's neck. 'Ahh' the moan that came out of Chay's mouth was clear that the man was not hiding his face as he was kissing Chay's neck. 

The boy lifted his face, holding both of Chay's wrists with one of his own hands above his head, and looked into Chay's eyes and asked, "Do you love me?" Hearing his question, Chay immediately nodded his head and breathlessly said "Yes, I love you very much". Chay and the boy turned their eyes to me and started laughing. 'Ahhh ahhh' as ​​the boy was thrusting inside Chay, moans started coming out of Chay's mouth again. 

'Stop, please stop' I begged them to stop but they ignored me and continued their madness. Chay's moans grew louder with each passing moment and I covered both my ears with my hands in hope that it will help me to stop hearing them. The mocking words 'Chay loves me' rang in my ears and when I looked up the boy and Chay were again laughing at me. 

'He can never be yours' 'I love someone else' 'Ahh ahh' 'You're not good enough for him' 'Chay love me' all the voices started ringing in my ears. Tears could not stop flowing from my eyes. I closed my eyes. I held my hands tightly over my ears so that I could not hear a word and lowered my head to my knees.  Slowly the darkness around me faded away and when I looked up in horror I was in my room. A paper cutter was placed in front of me on my right side and I sat looking at it for some time. At times all the previous things appeared before my eyes one by one and I began to hear the voice within me. 

'If the person I love is not going to be mine, then what is the use of me? I am good at everything. Everyone praises me but if Chay doesn't value me, what's the point of all this? What does that boy have that I don't have? But I don't know if the person Chay loves is a boy or a girl' I laughed at my last thought. It's been a month since Chay rejected me and since that day I haven't been able to sleep at night. Every time I sleep at night, I have nightmares. 

Nightmares in which Chay leaves me for another person. Sometimes Chay and that guy get intimate on the bed and I see them both making love to each other. All this has become unbearable. I can't see Chay in anyone else's arms but mine. I moved my hand to the paper cutter and picked it up. In one swift movement I moved the cutter through the veins of my arms. 

The emotional pain of rejection and humiliation overpowered the physical pain. The blood flowing from my wrist started pooling near my feet. My body bent forward on its own and threw aside the cutter and dipped my hand in the blood. As if the hand had its own head, it began to drop the words on the ground with blood. Blinking my eyes two or three times and shaking my head in an effort to dispel the numbness I looked at the words I wrote, I realized that even in my last moments, my body and my soul yearned for Chay.