Beyond The Fine Line

Chapter XXXI - Paths Yet To Diverge

The penthouse was shrouded in a muted stillness, the kind that settles when something that once brought life into the space disappears. The city outside continued its perpetual hum, the twinkling lights of the skyline doing little to alleviate the heavy atmosphere inside. The moonlight reflected in a bottle of whisky, casting playful lights over the untouched glass beside it. Still, it couldn't break the silence that ruled over every corner.

When Sean stayed over, the whole place transformed. There was a warmth, an indefinable presence that chased away the overbearing emptiness. Sean's laughter, his scattered textbooks, the subtle scent of his cologne – these small things made the penthouse feel like a home, or at least how Jay suspected a home should feel.

But now, with Sean gone, the feeling of emptiness had returned with a vengeance. It was an all-consuming void that threatened to swallow him whole. He had been avoiding Sean for the past few days, ever since that kiss in the park. Hiding behind the usual excuses of being too busy with work, he had managed to create distance – no casual sex, no shared dinners, as if he had vanished entirely.

Jay stumbled into his bedroom and lifelessly dropped onto the bed. The quiet was oppressive, a stark reminder of what he was pushing away. His hand drifted to the pillow beside him, still faintly smelling like Sean, and he felt a pang of longing so intense he couldn't stand it. But it was better this way... or so he kept telling himself.

Suddenly, his phone lit up with a single message. Jay glanced at it, sighed, and dragged himself to the front door.

"What are you doing here?"

Victor grinned at him. "Officially blowing steam after exams. They didn't even ask, so I assume our reputation covered the details," he chuckled, then fished out a bottle of 18-year-old Macallan. "This is the real reason."

Jay rolled his eyes and let him in. "You are the only person with the audacity to arrive at someone's place in the middle of the night unannounced."

"You're welcome."

"God, you are really a pain in the ass," Jay moaned, dropping on the sofa in the living room. "Glasses are over there."

Victor glanced at untouched whisky on the coffee table but said nothing. Things must have been bad if Jay hadn't even tried to drink them away.

"Since when do we need glasses?" he chuckled, plopping on the sofa beside him and opening the bottle.

"Fair enough," Jay huffed.

Victor passed him the whisky. "So? Why are you a bigger mess than you were last time?"

"I'm fine," he responded, taking a swig, amber gold liquid pleasant burning down his throat. "Besides, you have bigger problems to deal with than my casual sex going wrong."

"Or it went very right, and you just refuse to accept it."

Jay sighed. "We both know this way is better. Sean is really great, you know? The type of person that makes you think you finally belong somewhere," he paused, looking down at the white label. "He didn't deserve any of this."

"What makes you think you don't deserve someone like him, huh?"

"C'mon, don't act like you don't know me," Jay replied, irritation creeping into his voice.

"I'm saying this because I know you so bloody well," Victor countered, grabbing the bottle from Jay and taking a long swig. "In the last seventeen years, you've pulled me out of trouble countless times, helped me through the worst shit, and now you're getting an entire apartment in New York so Alex and I can have a fresh start. There isn't a thing you wouldn't do for someone you care about, and it's fucking sad that you don't care about yourself at all."