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"this dorm was once a madhouse" i made a joke, "well it's made for me" how evergreen our group of friends
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LATE DECEMBER 1980
Grief destroyed Celeste, while it focused Sirius. It made Celeste lose her mind while it would weld Sirius into a brutal blade. One fractured and wraith-like. The other left a trail of slaughter in his wake.
That was the stark contrast between the two.
Celeste was distraught and silent as she smiled at Lily and Alice, their stomachs both significantly swollen. She folded herself into the corner of Sirius' living room, trying to stay out of sight. To avoid the talk of babies and motherhood that she could never relate to.
It was a wretched feeling that bordered envy.
Sirius was speaking to James, grinning broadly while hitting his best mate's arm. He appeared elated, though the glint in his eyes suggested otherwise.
"Oh, I just can't wait for our family to grow," Lily gushed. Her hand was placed protectively over her belly. "Do you have any ideas for names yet?"
Alice's face lit up. "Well, if it's a girl ― Frank and I think she should be called Evangeline. Eva for short. But for a boy ― Neville. It's got quite a ring to it, doesn't it? Neville Longbottom."
"Oh, I know he or she will be adorable either way," Lily sighed. "James wants some absurd name like Elvendork. Something about being gender neutral."
As both girls laughed, Celeste finally looked away. She felt a knife in her gut, twisting deeper and deeper inside her. Smiling lightly, she crossed her arms over her stomach as she saw Remus approaching.
Remus joined her side with a wistful exhale. "I can imagine how you feel."
She was surprised. "Really?" she asked carefully.
"I'm in a situation too. I don't think I'll ever have..." Remus hesitated, as though he were warily choosing his words. "A life like that. With a whole family. We're not so different, I think."
Celeste stilled as her gaze lingered on the scars that had always been etched on his face. She had never tried to guess the reason behind them. Her face fell. "I've never noticed. I'm sorry."
"Don't worry about it," Remus smiled. "It's been ages since we've all hung out, hasn't it?"
"Wasn't it just James and Lily's wedding?"
"That was months ago!"
She laughed, covering her face with her hands. "Has it really? Merlin, I need to get out more."
