Loop of lies {FAKE DATING!!}

#12 A familiar face in picture

It's 2:00 AM and I find myself awake and restless my fingers scroll through my phone searching for something to distract me, but nothing can take my mind off Annie, I miss her deeply and the silence between us is deafening. it's been a whole month since we have been apart. We have only spoken once the distance between us makes it hard to meet and a strict mother adds an extra layer of difficulty we can't even talk or text due to the limitations. The situation is beyond frustrating.

the feeling of loneliness is overwhelming, and it consumes me when i am apart from Annie, the person with whom I share the deepest parts of myself, she is the one who knows my every thought, my fears and my secrets. I should not be so relying on her, but without her by my side, I feel incomplete, as if a part of me is missing.

School was starting in one week and I was happy I could meet her finally, but I am impatient.

**********************

I decided to text her to ask if she would be coming to school

after a few mins when i came back to check, it was left on read. probably her mom

next day after that i asked again, no answer

Anxiety consumed me as i contemplated the possibility that she might not be continuing here. The thought of us being separated felt like a dagger to my heart. the idea of losing her presence in my life filled me with a sense of profound loneliness, as if a part of my soul was being torn away. how would I cope with it?

I did not see the next morning coming the way it did, i checked my phone and she messaged me finally

I read her message

"Hey so it may be looking like I'm ignoring you but please trust me I'm not I saw your message the day before yesterday but I couldn't reply because I didn't know how to like say anything, I was really scared of your reaction and well my overthinking side was killing me and I We'll say that I had 100 imaginary scenarios ready in my head from bad to worst about how this is going to go. I tried texting you yesterday, but I didn't get the phone and that's why I'm telling you now. I'm telling you right now because nothing was confirmed before, so the thing is basically, I'm not continuing in Windson's. please don't stop reading here I'm really sorry I really did want to stay with you like seriously I even had plans and perfectly made scenarios on how we would meet on the first day of school, but the thing is many of my father's colleagues told him that Windson's isn't good for higher education, and you remember a senior that I would talk to? her mother and my mother are friends, so she told my mother that this school is not good and that's why they have decided that they're goanna change my school. Plus, my mother thinks i need new environment and a new school would be a good start. I seriously don't want to be away from you, this is all out of my control. Now the thing is we discussed a lot and Maplewood international school was closer now there is some sort of good news for you that I have been admission to Maplewood, and as you know it is like so close to Windson's , like we can meet but obviously not always I don't know if you'll reply or not but if you'll give me a call and let me pick up so you know I'm online and reading your message and not my mum, god bless your fingers for scrolling so far I know it was a damn long message sorry, i love you 3000"

GOD DAMMIT, my fingers froze, and I just could not believe anything i was reading, so it was confirmed that this year I am not going to be with her. we have been best Friends for only a year, this was too soon.

As I read her messages repeatedly, I was overcome with shock and disbelief. My heart sunk deeper with each passing moment Each passing moment, desperately searching for a glimmer of hope in her words but no matter how many times I scroll through the texts there was no sign of the reassurance I longed for, instead all I found were endless apologies from her. I kept hoping that maybe I had missed something that's somewhere in those paragraphs there was a message saying "I'm continuing here with you don't worry" but the absence of such words shattered my hopes. i was re-reading it again and again.