Angel - Kim Seokjin (2/4)

#7 - A Nobody

"You know, I did say you could play my violin," Jin's voice still insists as I unlock my apartment door.

"I know. I just love mine a bit more than yours," I send a smile over my shoulder.

"Just a bit?" He prompts.

"Mhmm," I nod.

"Wow. It has feelings, you know," He presses his hand to his chest to pretend to be hurt. I shake my head, chuckling as we step inside.

Stuffing his hands in his pockets, he slowly glances around the apartment. Because it's all mainly open plan, the main rooms (kitchen, living room and dining room) are all on show for him to see.

Since I'm all worked up now and eager to get started with the song, I figured I'd stop by my place to get my violin.

Even though Jin already has one, I just feel more at ease with my own. It's gotten me this far - why replace it now?

It just never occurred to me in the moment that I'd be letting him into my home. But it doesn't feel out of place at all. The way he's at ease as he walks around makes it seem like he lives here as well.

"Nice," He mumbles under his breath, hands rested on one of the dining room chairs. "You live by yourself?"

"No, Songmin lives here too. She's at work," I don't know how she deals with all the work she's given. She's very lucky she can handle a big workload.

"Ah," Jin nods, taking his time to walk round the table and sit on the back of the sofa. "Wasn't there a time you lived with Jiyeon too? And the other one...I forgot her name."

"Hayoon," I laugh, making a mental note not to tell her Jin forgot her name. Jin's her favourite as well. That's pretty sad.

"Yeah, we all lived in a smaller apartment. Moved out a while ago, now," I stand opposite him, leaning back on one of the table chairs.

I do miss the four of us together. The days when we'd bake cookies, when we'd decorate the apartment for every holiday, the nights where we'd be so tired from studying that we'd have a mini sleepover in my bedroom. It was always in my bedroom.

"You miss it sometimes, don't you?" It's like he's reading my mind.

Fiddling with my fingers, I look up into his eyes and nod.

"I miss taking care of them," I faintly say. "I know I was a student too, but I'm the eldest one. So I felt as if I had to make sure they were all okay and they weren't putting too much pressure on themselves. Something I know you can relate to."

A small smile spreads on his lips. The look of recognition on his face is hard to miss.

"It's nice to watch them grow up. But in the process, you don't realise that you're growing up too. And you don't need to be there for them anymore," It brings a saddened yet proud smile to his face as he speaks. "Because they don't need you anymore."

"I think they'll always need you, Jin."

Jin's jaw twitches as he looks at me. There's a hint of uncertainty in his eyes, but it quickly fades.

"You think?" He grins, standing up straight and taking a step forward.

Nodding, I take into account the height difference between us as he stands. It's not too much of a difference; I am the tallest out of the 4 of us. But, of course, I still look up to Jin. I'm not that tall.

"I think they'll always need you too," He says, talking about the girls. "It seems like we can't let go of our children."

I fight the urge to widen my eyes. Our children. Huh. For some reason, it doesn't sound weird when he says it.