Adventure of Gravity Falls

~Chapter Four~

Thirty years ago...The bird walks off as the young Stan and Ford run by. Young Ford said "Hehehehe! Hey, wait up!" Young Stan said "Heh! Yeah, you should keep up", Young Ford said "I...I can keep up!" Young Ford and young Stan were looking through the cave and young Ford said "Whoa!" Young Stan said "Neato!" Young Ford said to young Stan "Mysterious, boarded up cave! It might be filled with lost prehistoric life forms or Mesoamerican gold!" Young Stan said to young Ford "Uh, ladies first", so young Stan and young Ford punched each other and laughed together. Young Ford tries to get a board off of the cave, but fails and falls backward, young Stan said "Ha ha! Good thing you've got your smarts, Poindexter. I've got the other thing. What is it called? Oh, right, punching!" After punching the board and looking at his hand, he said "Cool. Splinters!" Young Ford turned on the flashlight and went into the cave with young Stan, young Ford said "Whoa, it's so creepy in here!" Young Stan said "Hey, don't worry, bro. Wherever we go, we go together. Don't forget to leave our names so they know who owns the place", so young Ford wrote their names on the boards and they chanted their last names together "Pines! Pines! Pines! Pines!"

In the present, Ford placed me on the chair and turned around looking at Stan, Mabel, Dipper and Soos, Stan said "Finally! After all these long years of waiting, you're actually here! Brother!" Ford punched Stan in the face and Stan said "Oh! Ow! What the heck was that for?!" Ford is pissed off at Stan and says "This was an insanely risky move –restarting! Didn't you read my warnings?!" Stan said to Ford "Warnings, schmarnings. How about maybe a thanks for saving you from what appears to be, I don't know, some kind of sci-fi side burn dimension?" Ford is furious with Stan and said "Thank you? You really think I'm gonna thank you after what you DID THIRTY YEARS AGO?!" Stan said "What did I do? Why, you are ungrateful...", but Stan tried to punch Ford in the face, Ford just dodged it and grabbed him. Stan said to Ford "Don't expect me to go easy on you, just because you're...family. Ah!" Mabel looked at Stan and Ford, she said "Hey, hi. Mabel here. Quick question – WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE?!"

Ford was shocked and said "Stan, you didn't tell me there were children down here" and then he pointed to Soos, who smiled goofy at him, he added "And some sort of large, hairless gopher?" Soos said "Heh heh. I get that a lot", Stan got up and dusted off the dirt from his suit, he said "They're your family, Poindexter. Shermie's grandkids" and Ford was pleasantly surprised and said "I-I have a niece and nephew?" Ford walked up to Mabel and shaking her hand, he said "Greetings. Do kids still say greetings? I haven't been in this dimension for a really long time" and Mabel is looking at his hand and said "Whoa, a six-fingered handshake? It's a full finger friendlier than normal!" Ford laughed and said "He-ha, I like this kid. She's weird", Dipper is shocked that he is actually meeting the author of the journal "I-I can't believe it. You're the author of the journals!" Ford said "You've read my journals?" Dipper said "I haven't just read them; We've lived them! We've been waiting for so long to meet you, I-I don't know what to say I have so many questions- Oooooohhh I think I'm gonna throw up. Hmmpf! No-no, false alarm. Hmmpf! Just gotta ride it out!" Ford said to himself 'Lynn has been reading my journals' and he turned his head and said "Listen, there'll be time for introductions later. But first, tell me, Stan – are there any security breaches? Does anyone else know about this portal?" 

Stan crossed his arms and said to Ford "No, just us. Also maybe the entire U.S. government", Ford shocked and angry and said "The what?!" Agent Powers and his men are here at the Mystery Shack, he said "Fan out! We're not going anywhere till we find Stan Pines and those kids!" Ford sighed and said "Okay. It's all right. We've got a while before they find this room . We just need to lay low and think of a plan", Mabel said "Well, it looks like we're stuck down here for a while. Who wants to tell us their entire mysterious backstory?" Ford is still writing and said "Yes, I have some questions about all this myself, Stanley", Dipper is surprised and said "...Stanley?" Mabel said to Stan "But your name is Stanford" but Ford is enraged and said "Wait, you took my name?! What have you been doing all these years, you knucklehead?!" Dipper said "Yeah, Grunkle Stan, no more lies! You owe us some answers – What's the deal with this portal? Why did you keep this a secret?" Mabel asked "And what happened between you and your brother?" Soos said "I'm hoping all this aligns exactly with my fanfic, Stan. If not, I will be very disappointed".

After Stan and Ford finished their backstory, Dipper said "So all this time you were just trying to save your brother. Grunkle Stan, I'm so sorry I didn't believe you", Stan said "That's okay, kid. I probably wouldn't have believed me either" then one of the agent said to Agent Powers "I heard talking! It was coming from downstairs!" Stan said "Oh no, it's too late, the agents are comin' for us!" Mabel asked "What do we do?!" Soos said "Aw, man. I was so spellbound by your dramatic tale I forgot all about those dudes", I weakly opened my eyes and said "Dipper, you have the memory eraser in your backpack" and Ford walked up to me and said "You need your rest, Lynn", Dipper said "Lynn is right. That's it! Lynn and I think I know a way we might be able to defeat those agents!" Dipper handed it over to Ford and Ford said "Lynn is smart. Of course! I don't know how you and Lynn got a hold of one of these but, this is perfect! If I can just amplify the signal to a radio headset frequency...There. Now everyone PLUG YOUR EARS! GET DOWN! NOW!"

Agent Trigger said to Agent Powers "Sir! Looks like there's a hidden door behind the vending machine!" Agent Powers said "Excellent! Get me Washington on Line 1! I've been practicing making sounds of excitement for this very occasion. Hey, have you heard that?" Agent Powers and his men's minds have been erased, Agent Powers asked "What? Where am I? Why am I standing in front of some sort of goofy fun knick-knack house?" Ford comes to the porch and said "Stand down, gentlemen! I've been sent with the latest Intel from Washington. According to this very real report, the power surges in Gravity Falls were actually due to radiation from an unreported meteor shower. A total embarrassment for your whole department. Luckily I'm here to take this mess off your hands, but I'll need all your... floppy disks and 8-tracks...right?" Agent Powers said to Ford "Uh, everything about this case is contained on this drive" and Agent Trigger handed the drive to Ford and Ford said to them "Well, what are you waiting for, a kiss on the cheek? Get out of here before I have your butts court-martialed!" Agent Powers said "Uhh, yes sir. Apologies, sir. False alarm, everyone!"

Agent Powers and his men left the Mystery Shack, Ford handed the drive to Gompers the drive and the goat ran away with it in his mouth. Mabel, Stan, Dipper and Soos ran out of the Mystery Shack, Soos was carrying me in his arms. Mabel said "Great-uncle Stanford, that was amazing!" Stan said "Let's not go crazy; it was serviceable", Ford went up to Soos and said "Hand Lynn over to me, please" and Soos handed me over to Ford, he turned around and said "Thank you, kids, but please, call me Ford". Dipper took out his notepad and his pen from his vest and said "Sure! Thanks, Great-uncle Ford. So, uh, would you mind if I ask you a couple billion questions about Gravity Falls?" Ford said "Um, well I-uh..." and Stan said to Dipper and Mabel "All right, kids. It's been a long day and me and my brother have a lot to talk about. So, why don't you hit the hay, huh?" Dipper said "But, it's the author! I've been waiting so long to ask questions about-" and Mabel interrupted "What about Lynn?" Ford said "I'm going to take care of her after talking to my brother" and Stan grabbed Dipper's and Mabel's head and said "I said. Hit. The hay!"

Ford finished getting dressed and went up to me to place a wet washcloth on top of my forehead. Stan and Ford are looking at themselves in the mirror, Stan said "Look at us. When did we become old men?" Ford looked at Stan and said "You look like Dad", Stan said "Ugh, uck, don't say that" and they both were laughing. Ford sighed and said "Okay, Stanley, here's the deal. You can stay here for the summer to watch the kids. I'll stay down in the basement and try to contain any remaining damage and take care of Lynn's health. But when the summer's over, you give me my house back, you give me my name back, and this Mystery Shack junk is over forever. You got it?" Stan looked disappointed and said "You really aren't gonna thank me, are you? Fine. On one condition: you stay away from the kids; I don't want them in danger. Cause as far as I'm concerned, they're the only family I have left and that's including, Lynn. I'll take care of her", but Ford said to him "No. You're not, Stanley. I promised her that I'm going to take care of her until she's feeling better", so Stan turned around and headed to his room and Ford went to my bedroom. I slowly opened my eyes and said "F-Ford?" Ford said "Yeah, it's me. I'm here now, Lynn" and I said to him "Thank you for being here with me, Ford", we fell asleep on the same bed together.

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