A New Chapter

nine

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, Courtney sighs as she reaches over to gently wipe a tear from the blonde's cheek as Leah sits propped up in bed with tears streaming down her cheeks. It's been a little over an hour since she found Leah on the bathroom floor and she's managed to get her from the bathroom back to bed while also dealing with the girls downstairs.

'How are we expected to just get on with our lives while not knowing what is going on with our baby?' Leah asks quietly.

'I don't know, bubs... When I spoke to the clinic on the phone, they said that at this stage there isn't really anything they'd be able to see on an ultrasound so there isn't really any point in doing one because it isn't going to give us any answers. They believe the best bet is to go for the blood test tomorrow and see what your hCG levels are. Once we get the results from tomorrow it'll give us a baseline and then we can see how your levels rise.' Courtney explains.

'I think this is almost worse than if the stupid tests had just come back negative.' Leah almost whispers.

'The not knowing is the hardest, bubs... Listen, let me go get the girls ready for bed and then I'll come back up and we can have a cuddle, yeah?' Courtney says softly.

'I can help... I can get the girls ready for bed you've been looking after them all day by yourself.' Leah replies as she pushes the covers further down her legs.

'No, stay where you are... I told the girls you've got a poorly belly, they'll want to come in and say goodnight but you are staying right here in bed.' Courtney says.

'But-' Leah begins and Courtney immediately shakes her head as she moves the covers back over the blonde's lower body.

'But nothing... Just let me take care of you, Le.' Courtney says and the blonde nods her head.

'I love you.' Leah almost whispers.

'I love you too.' Courtney replies.

****

Pushing herself into a sitting position, she sighs and glances down at Courtney who's fast asleep beside her. It's a little after 5am and she's barely slept; after putting the girls to bed last night Courtney had stuck to her word and came back to bed, promising to just hold her and get her anything she needed but she couldn't shake the feeling of dread that filled her when she thought of potentially losing their baby. Taking a deep breath, she flings her legs out of the bed as she hears Charley beginning to fuss through the monitor on her bedside table.

'Hey, baby girl...' Leah says softly as she makes her way into Charley's room where the little girl is now standing up clutching the side of her cot with a little pout on her face.

'Mama...' Charley whines, a small smile appearing on Leah's face as she walks over to the cot.

'Wanna snuggle with mama on the rocking chair?' Leah asks and Charley nods her head. Lifting the little girl into her arms, Leah kisses the top of her head as she walks the short distance between the cot and the rocking chair. She can't help but smile as she sits down and Charley immediately wriggles around until she's got her head resting against Leah's chest, her little hand clutching tightly onto the old Arsenal training shirt the blonde is wearing.

'Mama's got you, sweet girl. I'm right here.' Leah almost whispers, her hands resting on the little girl's back as they gently rock in the rocking chair. Running her hands up and down the two-year-old's back, Leah smiles slightly as she watches the little girl slowly fall back asleep in her arms. Many newborn nights were spent in exactly the same position with both Tilly and Charley. Resting her cheek against the top of Charley's head, she closes her eyes and uses her foot to keep them gently rocking.