💙Waiting for us 💙 ~seungbin ~

🌊Oxygen 🌊

~seungmin pov~ 

"You know, pretty faces like yours shouldn't be crying," Changbin says, closing the door and cupping my cheeks in his hands, using his thumbs to wipe my tears. My heart practically beats out of my chest. Changbin suddenly picks me up from my legs and places me on the counter. I gasp at the sudden action, and he goes back to my cheeks and pecks my forehead.

"Now tell me what's troubling you, pup. You never just cry like this after a successful practice. Are you ok?" he says, and god, if he only knew how much I just wanted to break down and tell him everything—how I wanted to tell him I can't be around him because my damn heart can't take not being with him, and how I just wish he could kiss me and wash away all my regrets. But I can't. I can't do that because it can ruin everything, right? I sniff and look him in the eyes.

"I-I don't know what's wrong. I think I'm just happy and overwhelmed with how far we've come since we started this band and umm..." stall, say anything, just don't let him know your real reason. Make something up, please.

"Umm, my parents are fighting again, that's all. It wasn't bothering me when I left my house... now it is, I guess." I lied—kind of. My parents were fighting when I left, but they've been fighting for over 7 years now. I'm used to it—their fighting sometimes. Changbin tilted his head and looks me in the eyes deeper.

"I don't believe you, but if you're not ready to tell me the real reason then I won't push it." He hugs me and then helps me off the counter. "Let's go, we ordered pizza." I smile and walk out with him, wishing I could go back and cry my heart out.

When we finish, it was around 11 at night, so we all took camp at the studio. We all slept in the living room like a sleepover. I was laying next to Changbin and the 00s when the hyungs got up and went to a room to "gossip," and that's what me and the 00s did too.

~Changbin POV~

I sit on the bed with the rest of the 00 line as they start asking me for details on what happened in the bathroom. "Ok, ok, Changbin, spill every detail. What the heck is going on with you and Seungmin lately, and is my ship sailing?" Hyunjin screams, and I just stare at him with a blank face. "You sound like your boyfriend."

He just smiled at me like he was proud. I roll my eyes and just give in. "Fine. Nothing happened, not really. I heard him crying so I might have kind of picked him up and put him on the counter, kissed his head, and made him tell me what was wrong with him." I blush knowing now what I did. They all start to squeal—god, they hang out with their boyfriends too much. "Poor Minnie, he was probably trying so hard not to combust," Chan says, and I smirk.

"I know, he looked like he was going to fly away and pop any moment. I was so close to kissing him if it wasn't for this stupid brain of mine," I whine and throw myself on the bed more.

"Hey, have you ever thought of just, I don't know, asking him out? It's very clear that you like each other. Why hide it any longer? There's no point in it," Lee Know says with a serious tone.

"I wish I could, but I can't. I really can't. He's my best friend and like a brother to me—or at least he was like a brother to me. I don't know what to do anymore. He's flooded every thought in my mind and I can't take it anymore," I say, grabbing my hair. I continue, "I'm just so fucking scared. What if we date and then he realizes we made a mistake and breaks up with me? I can't handle that. I can't lose him, not ever. He's like oxygen to me—I can't live without him. But my heart hurts every time I think about him because he can't be mine. My heart breaks every time I see him talk to someone that isn't me, and I can't do it anymore. But then I get this reminder that I promised to never let anyone or anything hurt him, and I'm just so scared of it that I can't let myself just love him." As I say all this, I can feel tears. I try my best to hide it, but it's no use—I'm pulled into a hug.

"It's ok to let yourself. If loving him is what you want, then you should follow your heart. That's what the group is about, right? Following our hearts. Maybe instead of the music path, you take the one where you let your heart decide if it's right—if you let yourself just love him," Chan says. I think about it for a second and nod. Maybe he's right. It's time for me to let my guard down.

(Fixed chapter )