Your Mentor

What does he Have that I Dont?

Sunday 9th, 2012

Yukikos POV

I leaned against one of the poles of the volleyball net, messing with the ring Ushijima gave me. I had a meeting with Oikawa; I wanted to have a more civil conversation with him after I yelled at him on that day. Now that Yuki is awake and healthy again I can start thinking straight.

I noticed the gate opening and saw him, "hey" he greeted "hey, thanks for meeting with me" I said "yeah, Ushijima was very persistent" he said. I smiled, "he is, I wanted to talk to you about what happened that day. I didn't mean to say what I said, I was just worried about Yuki and I broke down" I said "you don't need to apologize, you had the right to say all that stuff" he said "what?" I asked "I...wanted to impress you. When I heard from Nekoma that you guys were unbeatable I thought I could be the first, but I started acting on my own. I wasn't a captain that day, I was acting like a ruler" he said.

"Oika-" he cut me off "don't blame Kyotani for what happened, you should blame me. I was acting stupid and I deserve the consequences" he said. I inhaled a breath, "I'm not blaming anyone anymore. I don't know why I've been acting so selfish and cruel but I hate who I am right now. I want to move on because it was only an accident" I exhaled "and my next point, I don't think we should keep seeing each other" I said. His face held a slight look of heartbreak, "what's the reason" he asked.

I bit my lip, "I'm in love with someone else" I said "it's him isn't it" he said. I stayed quiet, I knew who he was talking about. I messed with the ring even more, I felt like I was going to puke with the guilt I had. I felt like I was playing with his feelings by seeing Ushi behind his back, but we were never official... So why do I feel so bad?

"I know who it is Yukiko, I understand. I hope that you're happy with him and I hope he treats you right" Oikawa gave me a hug before leaving the volleyball court. I was teary eyed, why was I crying? I was prepared to do this...wasn't I?

Oikawas POV

As I was walking home, I didn't feel a single thing inside. I wasn't sad, angry, hurt, just...nothing.

I was numb.   

I thought for a moment, would I be happier if I never agreed to this? If I just rejected his offer I wouldn't have been a moron and fallen in love. If I didn't get involved, if I let it go and moved on, I wouldn't be in this situation.

I entered my house and jumped, seeing an unknown figure in my hallway. I quickly turned the lights on and saw Iwazumi. "...Hajime?" I said "Hajime? Wow, shit really hit the fan" he said "what are you doing here?" I asked, "I wanted to check up on you," he said. I gave him an angry look, "you want to check up on me? Check up on me!? What the fuck Iwazumi! How long have you been putting this off!" I exclaimed "I know it's delayed but I was busy" he said "busy!? Too busy for your best friend? What the hell have you been doing!?" I asked "it's not important, I want to know what's been going on, I know that I've been absent but you know I'm worried about you" he said.

"Go to hell Iwaizumi, I needed you for days and you weren't there! I want to know what you've been doing that's SO IMPORTANT that you've been avoiding me" I said "I wasn't avoiding you!" He exclaimed "then what have you been doing!" I exclaimed.

"I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND!" He yelled.

I froze, "a...girlfriend?" I said "yes, I have a girlfriend. I met her the night of that festival date you had and I've been with her since the game at Kitsune. She's been going through a lot and she makes me forget everything" he said. "You've been with a girl this entire time?" I asked "I've been with her and being a captain to the team because you've been avoiding practice like the plague. You know how stressful you make my life Oikawa?" He asked "I'm a handful" I said "you're more then that, you stress me the fuck out, when you met this girl your entire life started to disinigarte and I couldn't let you kill yourself over her. I thought I was being helpful in telling you to compete with Ushijima but it was the stupidest thing I could ever tell you to do" he said.

"I'm sorry that I wasn't there, but this girl made my life so much easier. I was happier, relaxed, and in love. I wanted to forget about all the shit that's been happening and she does that and I love it. So I'm sorry that I wasn't there and I'm sorry that I misled you" he said. I stayed silent, I was pissed to say the least, Iwa had been MIA because of a girl? I know I can be a pain in the ass but are you serious !?

"Fine Iwazumi, Yukiko is in love with Ushijima and she doesn't want to see me again. There" I threw my coat against the coat rack and went upstairs slamming my door.

All the emotions hit me all at once. My tears finally came and my anger let out. I felt like I had no one, like I was useless, I fucked up and I'm facing the consequences for it. My best friend had someone who loves and cherishes him then why can't I? I thought I could compete with him but I ended up losing again...what does she even see in him?