Are Mates Forever?

Chapter 18

TW: self-harm

A/N I'm sorry for the cliffhanger.

Tuckers pov

'Fine," she huffed, 'only if you promise to be good while we sleep, I don't want you to still be hard as a rock when we wake up.'

'No promises' I teased back, 'now sleep.'

Rose's breath started evening out behind her, and so did Lilac's in front of Rose. 

'Tucker, you know you're gonna have to be open with them eventually, right?' Kade asks worried.

'I know Kade, it's just I don't want her to be hurt by my past,' I link back with a sigh. 

'You won't hurt her, Rose is an understanding girl, and Adria can't stay away from us, they're both in love with us.' 

'I don't think they should be, what if I lose control again.' I ask worried. 

'Tucker, you didn't lose control and you know it, it was the effects of suddenly being off the Witch Hazel,' Kade replies. 

'How can we be sure? It was dark magic, how do we know I'm not just dark inside?' I question. 

'I can't be, but you need to sleep,' Kade replies, and starts his stupid soothing thing. 

'Night' I say suddenly sleepy from Kade's comforting messages repeating in my head. 

Rose's pov

When I open my eyes Tucker and Lilac are both already out of bed, so it gives me some time to think. I wonder if they'll leave me when they see how broken I am? Or if they get impatient and try to do things  and I freak out? Why can't I just be NORMAL? They are both gonna see they can do better.

'Stop that, Rose' Adria links.

"Or what" I challenge aloud. 

'Or I'mma link Lilac and Tucker to come in here,' Adria threatens. 

'You wouldn't,' I link back, 'plus even if you did, I don't think they can help.'

Suddenly, Tucker walked into the room, in his boxers like he'd been changing.

"Adria linked Kade that you are talking bad about yourself?" Tucker questioned. 

"Yea, so?" I challenge. 

"So, you are the closest thing I'm ever gonna see to perfect, you are like the sunset and you're beautiful, princess." Tucker said.

"That was so cheeseyyy" I laugh.

"Yea, but it got you to laugh, now, what are you thinking about gorgeous?" 

"I'm not good enough for you or Lilac."

"Bullshit" Lilac says walking into the room.

"I agree with Lilac here, you are more than good enough" Tucker says.

"You are so sweet, your smile is the highlight of my day," Lilac says, "how in all the world wouldn't you be 'good enough?'"

"Because I'm broken, and used" I reply in a whisper. 

"You are the closest I'm gonna meet to perfect, I'm not gonna hold the past of what happened to you, which you couldn't control, against you." Tucker replies quietly

"What's wrong Tucker, something's off" I question instantly. 

"Um, nothing important" he replies quickly, looking away. 

"No, you have to tell us now Tucker," Lilac demanded. 

"I said it's not fucking important" Tucker growled in return. 

"Bullshit" I growled back.

"Fine, Lilac, get out, I don't want you in here if I'm gonna open up." 

'I'll be back babes, link me when he's finished talking and I'll tell you where to meet me, and yes Tucker is invited.' Lilac links. 

'Okay' I link back to Lilac, then focus on Tucker, "What's up Tucker?"

"So, I haven't been 100% honest about not knowing about being poisoned, I knew about the Witch Hazel, however I didn't know about the wolfsbane, if I had I wouldn't have continued to take it. I didn't let my witch side out before because, I have dark magic and the first time I used it I didn't know how to control it and accidentally almost killed Gabi, it's why I couldn't break up with her, because she would tell everyone I was a freak."

I accidentally let loose a growl at Gabi's name. "I'm sorry about the growl, it's just everytime you talk about her I get possessive I guess, but why didn't you tell us you were the one poisoning yourself?"

"Because I know you care and it'd just hurt you, and I knew you'd stop me from continuing to do it-"

"Damn right I'd stop you, but that's because it's dangerous and you could get hurt, I love you and care about you."

"Then I have one more confession, but you can't get mad at me..."

"I can't promise I won't get frustrated but I promise not to yell at you" I offer in return. 

"Good enough, I have been cutting myself, and before you say anything, I don't want to die, just make the world less numb, and I had stopped for a while, but then I thought I lost you..."

"Tucker, you won't ever lose me, I'm yours now, the only person you have to share me with is Lilac" I say hugging him. 

"I can live with that" Tucker says back. 

"Do you wanna talk about anything else?" I ask gently. 

"Not really."

"Okay, Lilac wants us to meet her then, she's on a run." 

"Alright, can we stay here for 5 more minutes and cuddle though?"

"Of course, handsome."