Book Two: KOTLC One-shots and More

Apology (Fitz POV)

A/N: In "Neverseen", Dex stayed in Fitz's room to talk/apologize after Fitz was injured while trying to rescue Prentice.  This chapter depicts that conversation. I had a hard time deciding whose POV to write this one from!

Fitz was feeling unbelievably drained after everything he'd been through that day. Breaking into Exile, a standoff with the Council, and being impaled by an arthropluera. And then...the start of the healing process.

He'd never been so sick in his life. Even the worst of Keefe's prank elixirs couldn't hold a candle to this.

He was exhausted.

But when Dex asked to speak to him alone, curiosity won out over his exhaustion. He hesitantly agreed and watched as everyone filed out of the room, obviously just as curious as he was.

Dex slowly moved closer, not quite meeting Fitz's eye as he came and sat down in a chair next to the bed.

"What's up?" Fitz asked after a moment's awkward silence. "You seem upset."

"Of course I'm upset," Dex mumbled, staring at his hands.

Fitz figured that was why Dex was in his room looking miserable and guilty. "This isn't your fault, Dex," he said quietly. "You didn't know Councillor Zarina was going to zap your gadget, or that it would make it way stronger when she did that. And you weren't in control of me when I decided to try to fling it out of the way. That was my choice, and I knew it could be dangerous." He smiled ruefully. "I didn't expect to be impaled by a giant antenna, but...again, definitely not your fault."

Dex sighed and finally looked up at him. "Well...it is and it isn't. I'm done pretending the gadgets I make don't have the potential for awful consequences. Not after..." Dex shuddered.

"Yeah," Fitz muttered, remembering how angry he'd felt a few weeks previously when he'd watched the Council place that ability restrictor on Sophie's head.

But he'd chosen not to hold it against Dex. Not when Sophie herself hadn't done so. Not when he saw how much Dex regretted building the device in the first place.

"But that's not why I'm here," Dex continued after a beat. "At least, it's not the only reason I'm here. I am sorry that this happened and that I am at least partly to blame for it, and I'm glad you're going to be okay. But..."

Dex was silent for a moment, his hands twisting in his lap as he seemed to struggle to find his next words. "Mostly, I feel like I need to apologize for...well...for hating you so much," he finished in a diminished voice.

Fitz felt his eyebrows raise in surprise as he tried to figure out how to respond to that. He knew Dex didn't like him. He'd never really understood it—he thought he'd been perfectly friendly when they'd met, but Dex had always seemed to have a chip on his shoulder.

And even as Dex had started to thaw a little when it came to the rest of the family—at least, he was reasonably amiable with Fitz's mom now, and he and Biana seemed to get along pretty well—his dislike for Fitz had obviously continued.

But Fitz hadn't expected Dex to openly admit to it.

And he still had no idea what to say, because it wasn't like Dex was offering to stop hating him. He was just apologizing for the fact that he did.

So finally he blurted out, "why do you hate me so much?"

Dex shrugged.

"I don't think it's just because I'm a Vacker," he pressed. If they were going to have this conversation, then maybe they should really have this conversation. Dex was important to Sophie. Keefe seemed to like Dex too. And Fitz didn't enjoy knowing that a seemingly nice person hated him. "I think maybe it started that way. But this feels like more than that."