Maybe contemplate hell before absolving yourself from it

Froyo shop of misery

"So...," Ink leads with, crossing his arms on the table, "come here often?"

Dream squints at him.

"You invited me—"

—"Put the goddamn Warrior Cats book away, then—"

Dream throws his hands up, "Well, what if I really don't wanna?"

Ink points at the book viscously, "You'll get your froyo on it! We come here, I pay, you read Warrrior Cats and you don't even eat the fucking froyo!"

Dream pauses, then stares forlornly at his Warrior Cats book. "It got to a really good part, though..."

Ink, with slow movements, takes the book from his hands. Dream doesn't fight, just eyes the book sadly as Ink closes it, setting it off to the side, leaning against the window, where it will be safe from any possible froyo attacks.

The sun streams steadily through the window, warming them from where they sit under it, melting their froyo at an alarming rate.

Nightmare has the right idea, sulking with his froyo on the other side of the froyo shop, supervising Dream and Ink's interactions with a critical eye.

Both Dream and Ink pretend he isn't there. Dream pretends that he hasn't done the same, tailing his brother and Blue on their dates.

It's at this point that Dream realizes that he's on a date.

Damn, he thinks, staring at the crazy motherfucker across from him, misstaaaaake.

Ink stares at him with a wide smile.

"So, um," Dream pauses, thinking, "what's your favorite film?"

Ink lights up. "Human centipede—"

From outside, a streaker runs by, screaming, "IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD, THE INFECTION IS REVIVING THE DEAD!", immediately followed by several police officers.

They hear shrieking as, out of their range of sight, the streaker is tackled to the ground.

Silence.

Ink, having not moved, decides to repeat, continuing, "Human centipede! I love the art."

Dream points at the window. "Are we just not going to mention that."

"If you're going to stare at other people naked you should really add them to the group chat," Ink answers.

Ink is very lucky that he's pretty, Dream decides, looking across the shop at his brother, who is just as baffled as Dream is, spoon of froyo in his mouth.

"We should have kids together!" Ink shouts. Dream stares as half the froyo shop—including his brother and the worker behind the till—turns to look at them instead of the window.

Slowly, Dream asks, "Do you mean that we should... adopt?"

"One of us needs to be impregnated."

Dream stares.

Uh—

Nightmare rockets to his feet, pointing at Ink with his plastic spoon, "OUTSIDE, MOTHERFUCKER! RIGHT NOW!"

Oh dear.

Ink throws himself across the table, trying to hide in Dream's arms as he shrieks. Dream's forgotten froyo is knocked off of the table by Ink's body. The worker behind the till has dead eyes as they watch.