Not all parents love their children / Clorscha

Chapter 8

Quinn would soon be a year
old. Unfortunately, the anticipation was overshadowed by the return of work stress.

But today the two parents had their day off from work. It was also the day of the week when Mimi and Rick took Quinn for the night.

Clodagh had wanted to talk to Sorscha about possible therapy for weeks. But a suitable situation had not yet arisen.

Evening fell and the two of them had already eaten dinner. Sorscha wanted to end the evening in a relaxed atmosphere with her wife. But Clodagh had been typing away on her laptop for hours.

"Are you finally going to tell me exactly what you're doing?" asked Sorscha.

Clodagh looked up briefly. "I don't think now is the right time?"

Sorscha raised an eyebrow. "You've been saying that for weeks. What's with the secrecy?"

Maybe now was the right time after all, Clodagh thought.

" I'm looking for therapy places.... For both of us..."

Silence. Sorscha just looked at her.

"Autumn suggested it and I think it would be a good idea."

Again, no reaction from Sorscha.

"It would be good if we both worked through our traumas..." Clodagh looked at her wife. "Sorsha, what do you say?"

Sorscha rubbed her eyes and pinched her nose bridge. " I don't need therapy ...." she mumbled.

"Everyone needs therapy sometimes. Do you want to come and see?"

But Sorscha shook her head. " Can we please talk about something else..."

Clodagh breathed a heavy sigh. She did it again. She diverted the conversation.
But this time Clodagh wouldn't let up.

"You know, there's nothing wrong with going to therapy. I did one years ago. To deal with my depression and internalised homophobia. Please think about it..."

Sorscha became a little more restless. "If therapy is so great! Then why don't you do another one!"

Clodagh was a little startled by her wife's tone. "Sorscha, I only want to help you..."

But her wife stood up with a thud and disappeared.

Clodagh laid her head on her arms. Great, what a flop. But maybe they really didn't need therapy.
Sorscha seemed to be doing better. Yes, sometimes there were still bad days and bad nights. But it was getting better.

Clodagh looked up again and closed the laptop.

She didn't go to bed until hours later. Sorscha was already lying there and seemed to be asleep.

She crawled carefully next to her wife. Clodagh quickly fell asleep too.

But her sleep was interrupted in the middle of the night. When she felt restless movements next to her.

She sat up and switched on the light, beside her on the cabinet.

Sorscha moved restlessly, sweat was on her forehead. She seemed to be having a nightmare.

Clodagh approached her carefully and stroked her arm.

Normally she would talk gently to Sorscha and she would calm down again. Usually she didn't wake up properly and just went back to sleep.

But this time it was different. Clodagh couldn't even utter a word when Sorscha was awake.

But she wasn't there, she still seemed to be trapped in the nightmare.