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E L E V E N

I softly smiled at Apollo while sitting in the airplane. The stewardess gave us two a bottle of water and nodded.
"We'll arrive in less than two hours."

Apollo leaned forward and looked out of the window. "You truly can't see anything!" He said. "Just pure white."
I was sitting next to the window, so I had no problem with looking at the outside.
But I was not interested in the clouds at all. My body was actually shaking because of fear and worry.

You may be wondering what the heck I was doing. Why I was in a freaking airplane and why I didn't tell you about the night after I found out about my fear.
And I'll explain it to you, don't worry.

Apollo's father wanted to spend a holiday at Bora Bora, the French-Polynesian island in the southern Pacific Ocean.
And since Apollo didn't want to be alone with his parents and his mom seemed to really like me, they told Apollo to ask me if I wanted to come with them. I was really excited and my parents were too, because now, they didn't have to worry about where to send me when they'd drive to Texas for their yearly vacation with their colleagues.

For the next two weeks (two weeks!!!), all that I wanted to do was have fun.
I wanted to enjoy the vacation like none other. Because this would be the first time in forever where my parents wouldn't be there to forbid me nothing.

And that all happened so fast that I didn't have the chance to tell you guys, sorry. It won't happen again, hehe....

Now, why was I afraid, you might ask?
Well, my weird positive feelings for Apollo still existed. I also had a huge panic attack when I found out I had to spend hours sitting next to him and two whole weeks trying to have fun when he was there too.
Not to forget the fact that this was the longest flight of my life. And you probably still remember the existence of the corruption.

Anyway. I tried calming myself down — which didn't really work — and convincing myself that everything would be alright... which didn't work either.
I was literally sitting right next to Apollo. The excitement in his face and the beauty of his deep eyes was just incredible. Incredibly beautiful. These words in my mind made the corruption melt, I could literally feel the tears in my corrupted version's eyes when seeing how small the corrupted part of my brain was now.

But it still existed, so the corrupted part of my mind decided that looking at Apollo and getting a seizure because of him was a bad idea.

For the next 30 minutes, I desperately tried to sleep.
And I couldn't.
I tried covering my eyes with the sleep mask that the airline gave us in the little bags that every passenger got, but it smelled like someone dipped it in a bottle of perfume. The smell made it practically impossible for me to sleep.
Then, I turned around and lied down on the side, but that was very uncomfortable because I was sitting on my seat.
After that, I just put my head on the seat and tried to relax. It still didn't work because the guy who was sitting behind me had started yelling at his girlfriend next to him.
"What do you mean, you forgot the condoms?! You know how expensive they are in a store at Bora Bora!"

Apollo giggled when hearing that while reading his book about astronomy.
The sound of his cute voice made my heart melt again. How was I supposed to survive two weeks with him? I'd either have to avoid him or accept the stupid feelings that I was still afraid of.

And since I didn't want to avoid this guy at all — I just thought he was way too cute and nice to not hang out with him — I had to live with the feelings I had.
I somehow wasn't even too sad about it.
Liking someone can make you do crazy stuff, I guess. I refused to believe that until I witnessed it myself.

After a while where I just played some offline games on my phone to make the time go by faster, the red sign on our screens was turned back on.
"Dear passengers, we will soon arrive at our destination. Please put your seatbelts back on and prepare yourself for the landing."

Apollo looked at me with excitement in his eyes. "Did you hear that? We'll be there very soon! Isn't that cool?!"
Then, he noticed how pale I was. "Is everything okay? Do you need something?"
I nodded. "I'm just not used to the height difference and the weird air here. I'm glad we'll be landing soon."
That technically was not a lie. I really didn't like the atmosphere in the plane at all. It was so weird to be so high up in the air for hours. And I was still sitting next to my... crush.

When thinking of that word, I felt a sudden urge to not look at him anymore. I noticed that I could see myself in the glass of the window. My cheeks were a little redder than usual, which made me panic.
I thought that I'd never blush at all.
And now, I was blushing because of someone else. Because of Apollo.

Well, that was new. I actually was not that kind of person that'd show their emotions openly, I used to hide them. That's because I wanted nobody to think I was weak or anything. There were indeed some things that'd make me show my emotions, but these were so extreme where others would've reacted much differently.

For example: my grandmother died when I was six years old. My entire family broke down and cried for two whole days, but I just went to my room, made a painting with me and her on it and wrote "Goodbye" on it.
I did cry, but only at the moment where I saw her dead body in the funeral parlor and realized she'd never make me cookies anymore.

I was not prepared for a sudden change in my mind's opinion about Apollo. And I didn't want one at all, especially since it had something to do with my emotions. The emotions that I desperately wanted to hide from others.

While I was still thinking about how to avoid Apollo in the best way, I noticed the that plane was flying slower and in the direction of the ground. I could see the endless ocean and the waves that were moving around in the deep, dark water. I wasn't afraid of the pilots failing to land the plane at all, I was just excited. For whatever reason.

Apollo and I were waiting for our luggage to arrive at the gate while his parents were standing next to us. I felt so weird and uncomfortable, but for the people passing by and seeing us, we must've seemed like a happy family with two kids.

When our luggage finally came, I grabbed my suitcase and waited for the others to get theirs too.
Apollo got his suitcase and came over to me. "Do you want me to help you? It seems really heavy, you know?"
Gosh, these eyes made me feel things I didn't want to feel at all, so I looked away and shook my head. "No thanks, it's okay."

"Are you okay? You seem pretty exhausted. Not that I want to call you ugly, but-..." Apollo blushed and looked down.
This time, I felt better. I looked at him with a smirk. "So you mean, I AM ugly, but you don't want to admit it?"
His eyes turned big. "No, you're pretty. Just a little pale."
"Hm. Probably the flight." I looked around for his parents and the smirk on my face was gone, but my inside was still grinning.
He called me pretty...!

We finally left the airport and went to a bus to go to our actual destination, and in the bus, Apollo was looking out of the window and just staring at the outside.
While I was staring at him.
Admiring how beautiful he actually was.

I realized that he was not beautiful like Tanner was. He just reminded me of Tanner because of the difference they had.
Apollo had another kind of beauty. Tanner looked like the perfect hot guy who'd take another girl home everyday. He wouldn't take a relationship too seriously. I know that sounds like a cliche, but you all have seen his personality before and can confirm that.

Apollo on the other hand was some kind of cutie. I know it and you know it too: he's a hopeless romantic. I've seen him stare at me and blush when I noticed plenty of times. He doesn't look like a player like Tanner at all, he's just cute. And he actually matches the character my ideal boyfriend should have.

But the corruption is strict — an obvious no.
But my normal brain is screaming and crying at me: "You fucking love him!"

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