i can't remember

12. hope and healing, part two

a/n: finally updating after a million years!

huge writers block and I was having a horrible time

anyways I have no idea why I chose this song, it just came into my mind idk

anyways, remember my cousin's friend who I said got into an accident?

I forgot to tell you guys but when he woke up the first thing he asked was "how is my car?" BRO U JUST WOKE UP AFTER HAVING AN ACCIDENT AND BREAKING UR RIBS AND U THINK ABOUT UR CAR?? 😭🙏💀

lol

anyways enjoy! <3
    
    
   
    
Gwen sat in the waiting room, tired.

Today she did a lot of homework and studied a lot, since she had three tests tomorrow.

Why did tests have to exist, seriously?

Just then, her phone started ringing, snapping her out of her thoughts.

Sasha was calling.

She accepted the call and brought her phone next to her ear before speaking.

"Hey, what's up?"

Ever since the day her cousin told her about Brooke, things between them were different.

Not in the weird kind of way.

It's just that ever since then, Gwen started seeing Sasha differently.

Now she knew what was wrong with her.

Now she understood why she acted so weird, and why she didn't answer any of her texts or calls, why she was always sad.

Now she understood everything.

"Hi Gwen, um... my mom asked if you want to come over today. We can pick you up after you finish with Danielle. She would ask your mom, but you know, she's at work today"

"Oh, I... I'm sorry Sash, but I have three tests tomorrow. I have to study"

"Oh, okay. That's fine. Anyways, do you have the Math homework? I don't understand it"

"Yeah. I'll send it to you when I'm home"

"Sure, thanks Gwen, bye!" she said before hanging up.

Gwen sighed before opening her Instagram and scrolled through people's stories.

She didn't really have anything better to do while she waited.

After a while, the voice of dr. Cooper calling her interrupted her.

The girl stood up and walked to the nurse.

"Hi"

"Hello Gwen, how are you feeling today?"

"Kind of tired, but I'm fine" she replied as they walked towards Danielle's room.

"School?"

"Yeah, I'm getting a lot of homework and tests recently"

When they arrived, dr. Cooper opened the door and they walked in.

Danielle wasn't reading today.

"Hi" she said quietly, but louder than other times. She was slowly loosing shyness. "How are you?"

"Hi Danielle, I'm fine, thanks for asking"

"How are you?" dr. Cooper asked.

"I'm fine, I was just thinking about what my life was like before the accident"

"Oh, well you girls can talk about it" the nurse said. "I'll be in my office, taking care of some things" she added with a sweet smile before disappearing through the door.

"Have I changed?" Danielle asked as soon as Gwen sat down on the chair where she always sat.

Gwen sighed before replying.

"It depends on how you look at it. On one side, you're a little more shy than before, since you don't know me that well yet. But you used to be rude and sarcastic. Maybe you were trying to hide your problems with your personality. You're also more... caring. I don't know how to explain it, but it's like, after you forgot about your problems, you only care about other people. On the other side, deep down, you're still the same. The same Danielle that has been my best friend for almost ten years"

They both smiled at each other.

"What kind of problems did I have? Except for my insecurities, you know"

She thought for a minute before replying.

"I hate saying this, but you didn't just hate yourself. You hated your life. You hated everyone. You hated everything. You didn't see a meaning to anything. I always tried telling you that you would understand soon, and that you just had to wait, but you didn't listen"

"Wow, I was really ungrateful"

"No, Danielle, you weren't. That's life. There will always be something wrong. That's why we should always be there for eachother"

Danielle nodded before the other girl continued.

"It's kind of my fault, and I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told you that 'it's just a phase', because it wasn't. It's never just a phase. I was so obsessed with trying to make you stop thinking so negatively, that I didn't realize that this whole time, the problem was me"

"No, don't say that. Nothing is your fault. Let's just forget the bad times"

She nodded.

After a long silence, Gwen broke it.

"Have I told you about the first time we met?"

Danielle shook her head.

"We were six years old and we were both in the same class. It was our first day of school. I remember everyone started to call me a weirdo, except for you. I never knew the reason those kids were so mean, but if I'm being honest, I never cared about that. I cared that you told everyone to shut up. I cared that you came to my seat to tell me not to listen to those dummies. I care that since that day, you have always helped me and supported me. Over time, you started changing. You weren't the sweet, nice, caring little girl you used to be. You weren't the same anymore. Of course, you had your reasons"

Gwen took a deep breath before continuing.

"When I found out that my best friend had been doing self harm and was thinking about ending her life, I got really worried. I tried helping you in every way possible, giving you every advice I could think of. I understood you because I once was like that too. Although no one ever found out. I never understood how, but one day I just realized how much I love my family and you, and that I couldn't do that to anyone"

Danielle got up and hugged her.

After they broke apart, she sat on her bed again before speaking.

"Maybe destiny made me have an accident so I would change and understand. Maybe it was to realize that I should be more grateful"