Everyone hits rock bottom at some point in time where the only possible way back up is do to whatever it takes.
*****
Thain doesn't need affection he believes that he has to be head strong always and to accomplish that he...
I laid staring at the ceiling my mind partly wondering off as I stared into nothingness. It was now 10am and today is one of those rare days that I allowed myself to sleep in yet I don't know if that was the correct term seeing as I wasn't actually asleep. I've been awake since 6 this morning yet I laid immovable looking off into the distance of my bedroom ceiling.
There is just too much to think about and it all was too much of a burden as it is right now. There's actually one thing I could admit keeps me up at night and that is the fact that somehow I was about to let Gillian have his way just to put an end to this madness. How is it that I could possibly let him take her for whatever fucked up reasons he might have?
Fuck sake, I might have just played along to his stupidity all this while simply because I felt bad for having played apart in ruining his plans but at some point he's got to understand that it was his father's choosing.
I've thought about this plan over and over so many times and each time it comes up short of sense to me. Yes it was a good plan one of little to no flaws yet everything in me was pleading for me to go against Ariana's wishes and call it off. How am I supposed to sit and watch him have his way when that was exactly what pushed me to this point of wanting him dead? How am I supposed to sit and watch him take the only person that meant something to me?
If not for Ariana's sake this whole thing wouldve already went down the drain, but she insist on going forward with this stupid plan I had conjured up just to have got her to stick around and now she won't back out no matter how frugal I made this whole thing sound. I am to be blamed for getting her in this mess to begin with but I just need her to say the word and I'd abort this absurdity.
I would much rather go do my dirty work myself has I had planned to from the beginning but I knew this was how I'd get her to be around me without having to hold her hostage yet I suppose this whole thing has gone beyond my control. If it was totally left in my hands she would have nothing to do this at all.
I close my eyes taking a few deep breaths as to calm myself before getting out of bed and walking to the bathroom. I was aware that in just an hour time I'd have to attend this event, still I couldn't say I was totally in the mood to do so. There was just too much going on and too little time to ponder over it all.
Still I decided to use this hour to get myself together and get ready for this outing. A shower will maybe help me boost my energy a little so with that thought I got in and had a nice hot one. Getting out and doing my daily routine I style my hair before walking to my closet and getting dressed in my already steamed suits which I paired with black Louboutin loafers and a gold rolex watch.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
.Grabbing my wallet, phone and car keys I exit my room to be met by Kaiden who was also sporting a suit. Saying our good mornings as greeting we both begin walking down the hall way.
In all honesty I don't feel like today's my day at all. I mean I woke up in a weird ass mood which was to blame for my over thinking and now I'm ought to go be friendly with people I see only for business. How unfair is it that this was my life? I could be anywhere by now if had I not been rope into this lifestyle.
