Imperfect Fear

Eleven

I'm at the training room early. Elyria is already there, so we decide to start training without Tyran. I put her on a strength test. She was getting stronger but she still had the arms of a white.

The strength test is a whole body test. It is a tall weight that Elyria must push over a line. It starts out very light weight, but quickly gets heavier. It has levels, from 1 to thirty. Elyria is still only on level 9. By the end of training, she needs to be on level 20 or above. Which is fairly difficult because of how small she is and how she still has the frame of an 8 year old.

We'll get there.

Tyran still isn't there at 8:00, fifteen minutes after he's supposed to be. Elyria is taking a break for a minute and she is constantly looking toward the door with concern. I ignore her anxiety, avoiding thinking about why Tyran was late, because I already know why and every time I think about it I struggle to breathe.

"Where is he?" Elyria asks when I tell her its time to go back to training.

I shake my head. "He probably took the day off."

She frowns at me, noticing the sudden exhaustion in my voice. "Why would he take the day off?" She asks with a stern voice, so its less of a question and more of a demand.

I shrug, trying to force down the lump in my throat. "Forget I said anything. You need to go back to training." I tell her and move to go past her.

She grabs my shoulder, stopping me. "What's going on Maedana? Why isn't Tyran here and why are you almost crying!" She says angrily.

I blink tears away and wrench my arm away, looking down at her. "No, Elyria. I'm not talking about it and you need to train. Hurry up."

She gives me a glare of confusion mixed with anger and concern. I glare back at her for a few seconds, then turn and walk back to the strength tester. I wipe my eyes and take a deep breath. It's okay, I tell myself, just breathe.

Elyria follows me over a moment later and we continue training. She doesn't say another word to me about anything other than training until lunch. We arrive at the pretty much empty dining hall at about 2:00 with the other trainers and students.

We get our food and take a seat at one of the small tables. I start talking to Elyria about what we need to work on and I'm just going through what we'll do in the afternoon when Tyran shows up. He walks straight over to us with a weary yet agitated look on his face. He doesn't even acknowledge Elyria, just stares at me. "F, we need to talk." He says. His voice is tired and hollow of emotion. I nervously nod and go with him outside.

We stop a few metres from the door and I shake my head. "What do you want Tyran?" I ask, keeping myself calm.

He sighs. "I want answers. All I know is that I woke up this morning and Reese's name was on the death board. I tried asking people about it but no one knows anything. I spent ages this morning trying to find out what is going on and I still don't know a thing."

I avoid his gaze and focus on breathing. He seems uncomfortable, but keeps on talking.

"I couldn't find her this morning. I looked everywhere. Maedana, I need you to tell me. Is it..." He trails off for a moment, then continues I a voice full of confusion and worry. "Is it true?" I look at him and his face shows so much hope. He wants me to say no. He wants me to tell him it's just a mistake and she's just working. But I can't say that.

My bottom lip starts to quiver and I feel tears behind my eyes. With a sick feeling in my chest, I nod. I see his face crumble, the hope slipping away.

"How did she die?" He asks, and I can see from the way his face is pinched that he is holding back anger.

"A gun to the head." I mutter in a sad voice.