The Mentally Brave

Chapter 39

Zayn is finally back and him, Louis, Eleanor and Perrie lock themselves in the studio, so Zayn could paint without any interruptions.
It is getting late and I am dreading going back to the room and facing Harry.
I have said some harsh things, but so did he, and I am not about to apologize.
I am trying to convince myself I can face him, knowing that it's time to leave Luke and Niall's room since they are getting ready to sleep.
"Hey Liz?" Niall calls
"Yeah, I'm going to head back, I'll let you lot go to bed," I manage a weak smile, though It feels fake and I know Niall feels and sees it.
"You can spend the night here if you'd like," He suggest.
"It is tempting.. Though I should face Harry," I get up from my seat.
"Well, if you change your mind..." He gives me a hug "Don't worry, he will come around,"
"Thanks, good night Luke," I call to the closed bathroom door.
"Good night," I hear him shout back.
I wave to Niall and exit the room. I walk slowly towards the room I share with Harry, wondering in what kind of mood I might find him.
I take a deep breath before entering, convincing myself that this is just like all our other fights we had, though deep down I know this was different.
I push open the door, to find Harry already sleeping. At least he is in the bed and not on the floor, which would have been hurtful.
I change into shorts and a t-shirt, and after washing my face and brushing my teeth I climb into bed beside him. I am ready to turn my back to him when he speaks my name.
I sit up and glance over at him. He is facing me, his eyes dark and glinting.
"What?" I ask when he says nothing.
"Where have you been?" He questions.
"Where have YOU been?" I ask in return.
He doesn't answer, but continues to stare his hands tucked under his cheek as he did. I lay down mimicking the way he is posed, laying on my side staring back.
"Why are we fighting?" He finally whispers.
"Harry... I am going to ask you something, and I would appreciate if you would answer me honestly." He just watches me, waiting for my question.
"I can't shake the feeling something bad is going to happen..." I trail off
"I can't find the question in what you just said," He breathes.
"I guess I am looking for reassuring that everything will turn out ok," I sigh.
"What do you mean?" Harry furrows his brows.
"Whatever you and Ed and Liam are helping your dad with, promise me that no one will get hurt, I need to hear you say it," I am begging, the images I have seen in Louis' vision flashing through my mind, seeing Nat's lifeless body, hearing them claim the names of the dead. I think what scared me the most is not being able to see Harry.. Not knowing if he is alive or dead, not knowing if he had taken the lives of people.
Harry sits up glaring at me, "Liz, I don't know what is going on with you! What the hell do you think we are doing? We are only tracking Foster's people! That is it! Why would anyone get hurt by that?" He questions me angrily.
"Why are you tracking them? What good would that do?" I ask sitting up as well, so I could be at eye level with him.
"I don't know why... does it matter?" He grumbles
"That's the thing! It does! I have a bad feeling! And I am scared!! I don't feel safe here anymore! I don't trust your father! I don't trust the company! I don't like not knowing what is going on, and where I stand!" I raise my voice in frustration. How can I get Harry to see? To understand his dad is not to be trusted? I don't have the images of vision yet to show him, and I am afraid he won't believe my word for it, pushing him farther away from me.
"Damn it Liz! What the hell is your problem? You keep telling me I am keeping things from you- but something is up with you too- what aren't you telling ME?" He shouts at me. My face burns with anger, and I decide it is time to leave and go to Niall's room. I shift to climb down the bed, when Harry grabs my hand to stop me.
"Wait Lizzie, don't leave.. Talk to me, let's figure this out," He closes his eyes rubbing his hand over his face, trying to calm himself down.
"Why can't you believe me when I tell you something is wrong? Why don't you ever trust me?" Angry tears escape my eyes and I wipe them away with a shaking hand.
"You are telling me to pick you over my dad Lizzie," Harry narrows his eyes, but his voice stays calm.
"No, I am asking you to just trust me that is all," I pull away from his hold, slipping into my flip flops and heading to the door.
"Please Lizzie, don't go," Harry says, though it is half hearted, knowing we both need time to calm down.
I start walking towards Niall's room when I decide to change my course, and head to the studio to see how the paintings are coming along. As I walk the dark halls I play in my head what Ashton and Nat told us.
Our dad was back in England, he was sent to try and find out how many of us Dr. Cowell recruited. They think the split happened because Foster didn't want to make an army out of us, wanting to let us be and live our lives, while making sure we are safe. If that is true, we are the bad people, by that I mean whoever is helping the doctor, and that makes me sick to my stomach.
"Lizzie, fancy seeing you here, since you are the person I wanted to see," A cheery voice behind me says.
"Eww.. Lucky me," I reply in a sarcastic tone, "What do you want?" I turn to face Michael.
"The Doctor asked to see you," He smirks, delighted to be the one to come and fetch me. Which means this can't be good.
"It is twelve at night Michael, I am on my way to sleep," I turn to continue walking.
"Don't you share a room with Harry? Isn't it the other way?"
"I forgot something by Niall and Luke," I hiss at him. Telling Michael Harry and I are fighting is the last thing I want to do.
"You're lying," Michael's brows shoot way up, and I curse him under my breath.
"Lead me to Cowell then," I sigh in frustration, pacing up to him in defeat.
"It Is Dr. Cowell," He snaps at me as he leads me to the Offices.
"Why are Harry and you fighting then?" He questions as our steps echo down the hallway.
"We aren't fighting," I try to keep my voice even, trying my best to hide the lie.
"All couples fight, you'll get over it," He shrugs.
I can count on one hand the times Michael has been nice to me, and I add this comment to the short list.
When we reach the Office, Michael knocks and steps aside for me to enter.
"Why Hello there," The doctor smiles at me, and It takes my all not to pull a face.
"You wanted to see me?" I frown, wanting to get this over with as fast as I can.
"Yes, I hear you are asking questions about what we have been working on," The doctor gestures for me to sit, but I shake my head.
"That is correct," I agree. I want to hear what he is about to say, see what lie he comes up with.
"Well, we are monitoring Foster's people, making sure they aren't hurting anyone, that is all," He smiles. It is a fairly simple explanation, though it doesn't add up.
"Where are Eleanor and Louis?" I inquire, knowing the doctor doesn't know they are back yet.
"They were sent to Join Foster and his crew, to see if they are able to find out from inside what is going on."
"And when would we expect them back? I do miss my friends," I give him an explanation of my own.
"In a few days perhaps," He gestures. He is lying. I know that because Louis and Eleanor are back already.
"Lizzie, once we stop Foster, you all can go back to your homes and live your life as you wish," The doctor states softly.
I imagine going back to my home town, to my mum, but there is nothing there for me. My sister is here, my friends are here, the only good thing about all of this coming to an end is not needing to constantly look over my shoulder, making sure I am not being watched, or followed, some faceless person trying to catch me and bring me to a lab, to replace a guinea pig.
But who is the one that will bring this salvation upon us? Dr. Cowell or Foster? I am slightly confused not sure who to trust, who to listen too.
I remind myself of Louis's vision, but we don't know who triggered it, Foster or us.. I think about Harry, truly believing his dad had changed, and is doing all he can to keep us safe. But this feeling, the feeling of missing something big.. I just can't shake it. I glance up at the doctor, which is watching me carefully.
"There is this rumor," I start, my voice is measured. "A rumor about my dad being back in the country, is that true?" I ask.
"Your dad is with Foster, and thinks you're dead, why would you care if he is here or not?" Simon asks.
"He is still my dad! Harry had hope for you, why can't I have some hope for him as well?" I question. The doctor is not prepared for this kind of answer.
"Your dad will be the death of all of you," He suddenly exclaims, a loss of control on his behalf.
"You are lying!" I boom at him "You are not trying to stop Foster, Foster is trying to stop you!" I can't hold back any longer, my rage higher than it has ever been.
"I am not lying," The doctor is trying to regain some control.
"So why are you counting numbers when you aren't talking? What are you hiding from me?" I hiss.
The doctor looks at me, his eyes full of fire and hatred.
"We can do this the hard way Liz or you can take the easy way out," He whispers at me, every word sharp as a knife.
"You can sit back and keep shut, and let me get my plan started, or you can kiss goodbye your relationship with my son, because he is mine now,"
"What makes you so sure I will pick your son over the lives of my friends?" I fume.
"Because it would be a shame if something might happen to your dad, or better yet, little precious Natalie,"
My eyes widen in horror, "You would never touch my sister! Not after what happen to Amy! Not after seeing how important she is to Harry," I try my best to keep my head up, not letting it tremble.
"So what?! So he will hurt a little, he will grow stronger and forget.. You and your sister are not family- you're not blood, you are expendable".
I glare at him, trying my best not to choke him with my thought "In that case I will leave, no reason for me to stay," I sneer
"No, you will stay, because if you leave it will raise questions which means you did not keep quiet, which means someone will get hurt," An evil smile appears on Simon's face, and I am trapped, just like the mouse lab I tried so hard to avoid being.