OBLINE, KUSUO SAIKI.

Ψ. it's raining cats.

Ψ . . . SAIKI! SOMETHING IS WRONG. SOMETHING is seriously wrong!"

Saiki didn't even glance at Kaido as he shook out his umbrella and placed it in the holder next to the entrance. If he paid attention every time Kaido claimed something was "seriously wrong" he wouldn't have time for anything else.

The Dark Reunion hasn't attacked us yet, Kaido.

"I'm serious, Saiki! Just ask Nendo and Aren!"

As if on cue, the two burst in through the door, looking harried and miserable as rain dripped from their hair and uniforms. Saiki raised an eyebrow.

Did neither of you check the weather today?

"It's bad," Aren heaved, wiping the rain from his glasses. "It's really bad, Saiki. Tell him, Nendo."

"Huh? Oh right. Well, I woke up this morning and then went to take a shit—"

"Not that!" Kaido yelled. He took Saiki by the shoulders. "We saw Gojo get kidnapped, Saiki! Some guy forced them into this black car and just drove off! We haven't seen Gojo since!"

"It was really early in the morning too," Aren added. "Hardly anyone was around. They just plucked Gojo up. We were thinking of going to the police, but we weren't sure if Gojo had gotten to school or not."

Saiki's eyebrow remained raised. Gojo was kidnapped?

"Yes! Why are you not more panicked about this?!" Kaido shook him. "A hundred thousand people go missing in Japan every year, Saiki! Who knows where Gojo is? What if they're being tortured? Worse, what if the Dark Reunion has them!?"

Kaido was shrieking now, shaking Saiki so hard his teeth clacked together. The incoming students gave him a wide berth as they shook out their raincoats and went to get their shoes.

Calm down, Saiki said, removing Kaido's hands from his shoulders. Gojo is fine.

"The Dark Reunion is a serious threat, Saiki! Of course they would take one of my closest allies to get to me!"

Aren's face was pale. "Or it could have been the mafia."

Nendo nodded. "Or killer clowns."

They probably just got picked up for an appointment. They'll be at school later.

Plus, they're stronger than all three of you combined, Saiki added internally. Literally no one can lay a hand on them.

"I don't get it, buddy," Nendo said, rubbing the back of his head. "You and Gojo are like best friends. Shouldn't you be more worried?"

Saiki shot him a look. We're not best friends.

"Aren't you?" Aren said. "Gojo spends more time with you than anyone else that we've seen."

Because they insist on being a pain in my ass.

Saiki sighed. Gojo wasn't kidnapped. They'll be back for lunch and you'll have nothing to worry about. Let's just get to class.

Kaido, Aren, and Nendo traded glances. Saiki was not amused by the gruesome images he was getting from all of them about what could be happening to Gojo right now.

Did Nendo even know what killer clowns looked like?

"If you say so," Aren said. "But if they're not back by lunch, we're calling the police."

"I'll go after Gojo myself if they're not back," Kaido said, drawing a hand over his face. "I'll obliterate anyone who dares to hurt my friends."

"Wait, if you and Gojo aren't best friends, what are you?" Nendo asked.