As Shane re-entered the bedroom, Paris was seated on the bed, awaiting his return. He didn't glance her way as he proceeded to the sitting area and settled onto the couch. Leaning back, he lifted the prescription bottle to his face.
"Valium," he said looking at the bottle.
His expression was unreadable, leaving her uncertain of his thoughts or whether he was upset. He remained seated, examining the bottle, sometimes gazing into the distance. Meanwhile, Paris waited on the bed, anticipating his words.
After a prolonged silence, he spoke. Without meeting her gaze, his directive was clear to Paris. "Come here," he commanded, his voice tired and hoarse but authoritative.
A tinge of guilt went through her when she thought of how she was only adding to his long list of things to worry about. But that was part of the reason she was in the situation she was in now.
She didn't want the way she felt to be just another burden on his shoulders. Shane took care of her and his kids. He took care of Paris' sister and her mom. She couldn't even remember the last time she looked at a bill. If anyone questioned her about any of their financial obligations she wouldn't be able to tell them a thing because Shane handled all of that.
If he intended to disable her, while making her financially dependent on him, he succeeded remarkably. He effectively undermined her ability to be self-sufficient.
The separation, Justine died, Xavier's death was something she took accountability for, and then the straw that broke the camel's back was the death of her baby girl. Post-partum depression hit her like a train. The pills helped with that, but they still only led to a bigger problem.
Paris took a seat opposite Shane, who placed the bottle on the table and peered at the holographic clock on the wall. The inside of his bedroom was starting to get lighter and lighter and he still hadn't slept. "Why are you taking these?" he inquired, forearms resting on his thighs as he gazed into his wife's eyes, seeking an explanation before forming any judgments.
As she sat fidgeting with her fingers, Paris wanted to speak, yet each time she parted her lips, she felt like she was gonna fall apart. Sensing his wife's hesitance, Shane got up and moved towards her. However, before he could take a seat, Paris succumbed to her emotions, her tears flowing freely as the pent-up sorrow and heartache breached her defenses.
Rather than sitting beside her, Shane lifted her into his arms, holding her as her tears soaked his t-shirt. He gently laid her down in their bed and dimmed the lights. After closing the automatic shutters and curtains, he returned to the bed to join Paris, who was still sobbing and trembling.
Taking off his t-shirt he gave it to her so that she could wipe her face. Paris dried her eyes and laid on Shane's chest. "Talk to me baby, I'm listening." He said, kissing her forehead. The gesture sent chills down her spine.
Taking a deep breath, Paris wiped her eyes "We keep losing people." She began, "I keep losing people. Deja, my brother, my dad, kids, Sasha, Justine, my mother and my sister!" She said, leaving them last on purpose
They may have still been around but they weren't the same. "I feel like I have lost myself. And whatever I've been clinging to died with my baby." She cried, her emotions getting the best of her.
Burying her face into his chest, Paris was struggling to keep herself together. The loss of their baby was taking a bigger toll on her than she had led him to believe.
"The past couple of months have been draining, depressing, and one of the worst times of my life. About a week after I lost the baby, I had made up my mind I didn't even want to live anymore. I thought of ways to do it and everything, but the more I thought I realized my kids would still be sad and motherless. I was taking the pills because they helped." She said
"That's what I'm for Paris," Shane said
"Shane, you're always somewhere doing something. You're in and out of the country. Meetings after meetings and most of the time you're dragging me with you. Why would I want to put even more on you when I already know what you're dealing with and I know there's even more you're not telling me?" She asked
"Because Paris," he replied, "that's my job, that's what I signed up for. I can handle whatever you throw at me, but I couldn't handle something happening to you." Her words had offended him, his actions might have been questionable at times, but he always showed up for her. Shane consistently fulfilled his role as a husband and father.
"Well, now you know." She said
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Solo had been flooding Natalia's phone with calls, but there was no response. Ever since he left the club, he'd been trying to reach her, frustrated that she hadn't enabled her location as he'd asked.
Around 9:30 am, she finally picked up his call. "Hello," she said, her voice a blend of sleepiness and irritation.
"Where are you?" was his first question.
"Good morning to you too," Natalia replied, sitting up in bed.
"Where are you?" he repeated.
"Why?" she countered.
She could hear him sigh deeply. 'Yeah, that's how I've been feeling too,' she thought to herself.
"I'm at my sister's, with my mom," she informed him.
"You couldn't answer the phone and tell me that? Why you didn't turn on your location like I asked you to?" Solo asked, he had been up the majority of the night wondering where she was.
"You ask a lot of questions for someone who supposedly doesn't want me," she replied.
He chuckled. "I just want to make sure you're safe."
"I am safe. Can I go back to sleep now?" she asked.
"When will you be back?" he inquired.
"Why should I come back, Solo?" She paused, waiting for him to provide a compelling reason. Silence ensued, and she rolled her eyes.
"Exactly," she said. "I've been thinking, and I'm booking a flight back to Florida soon."
The silence deepened as Solo removed the phone from his ear and stepped out onto his balcony. He didn't want her to go, nor did he desire to distance her. Yet, he understood that letting her go was necessary to ensure her protection.
"Do you need a ride to the airport?" he asked, as it was the only thing he could think of saying. Anything else would have been a plea for her to stay, which would only add to the confusion and complicate matters further.
With a laugh of disbelief, Natalia was relieved he couldn't see the tears welling up in her eyes. "No, Solomon. I don't need anything from you," she responded before ending the call.
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