The next morning, I heard screaming all around me.
Am I in hell?
Why can't I see anything?
I opened my eyes and realized I wasn't even dead.
My expression went from confused to absolutely pissed.
I was in the hospital, the screaming I heard was my mother outside of my room.
I looked down and saw I had tubes in my arms and medications flowing through me.
My wounds were bandaged and I couldn't see them. But I could feel them and they hurt like hell.
The nurse looked down at me before her eyes went wide. She ran out of the room, seemingly to go get the doctor.
As I became more aware of my surroundings, I could hear my mother from outside better. She was arguing with someone.
"How could you let this happen?! How could you let her do this?" I heard a man yell.
Was that Darry?
"If this is anyone's fault it's yours. All of yours. I barely spend time with the girl, she practically lives with you. And it's my fault?! You should've caught it! You should've realized she was hurting! You should have noticed!" my mother yelled back to him.
It was everyone's fault.
It was mine.
It was my mom's.
It was my dad's.
It was the gang's.
Everyone was to blame.
Because maybe I'm the one who tried to end it.
But mom and dad led me to it.
And my mom was right.
The gang never noticed.
Not once.
The closest I got was what Dallas had told me.
And I was mad.
All I ever wanted was to be loved.
And I was for a while, I felt like the gang loved me for a while.
But after a while, they got caught up. And nobody had the time to love me anymore.
It's not like it was all about me, they had their own lives.
But they barely spoke to me.
I needed someone and nobody was there.
Not one person.
The door to my room opened, and the doctor walked in.
"I see you're awake? Are you up for any visitors?" he asked.
"Who's here to visit? I don't wanna see my parents, they're just going to yell at me for dirtying up their bathroom." I spoke, solemnly.
"Well, besides your parents there's a group of boys here to see you, and a little girl. They're all real shaken up, real happy your ok."
I told the doctor I would see the boys and Angie, and he walked out to let them know.
Not even a minute after the doctor left my room, a flood of people came in.
Angelica, Darry, and Johnny all ran to my side the quickest.
Angelica sat next to me on my bed, and snuggled herself under my arm and the blanket.
