What the Heart Wants

Chapter Thirteen

I woke up the next morning with puffy eyes and a tear stained pillow. I felt, and looked, like utter crap. I cried for hours last night before I eventually drifted off to sleep. I really didn't want to go to school today. I couldn't face Alex. That would just hurt too much. I couldn't face Sophie or Brian either because they'd both know something was up. Nevertheless, I forced myself to get up and dragged myself out of bed. I traipsed across to my dressing table and plonked myself down in front of the mirror. Man, I really did look like crap.

I had a red, blotchy face and puffy eyes. There were still tears on my cheeks. My hair was a mess and sticking up in all directions. It wouldn't take a genius to work out that I'd been crying all night. I groaned at the thought of having to make myself look presentable. Instead of attempting to tame the mess on my head I just threw my hair up in a messy bun and started working on my makeup. I pulled out some concealer and foundation in the hope I could try and mask my puffy eyes and red face. As I applied it, images of last night started to float into my mind...

Alex had gotten a girl pregnant. PREGNANT. He could be a father right now and not even know about it. That in itself was a lot to take in. But then I remembered what he said to me last night. He made it clear that he wasn't happy about Brian and I. He may not have said it but I could just tell. He was hurt.

I finished off my makeup before walking over to my wardrobe to pull out my uniform. As I slipped it on I remembered that I'd be walking to school alone today. Good. I could use some time to myself to just gather my thoughts. Plus, I don't think I could handle talking to Alex after what Mrs Piers had told me.

I finished getting dressed and quickly brushed my teeth before slinging my bag over my shoulder and running downstairs. I was going to be late. In all my thinking about Alex I must have lost track of time. Nice one, Lucy. I was too upset to even think about food so I didn't bother getting any breakfast and instead just ran straight through the kitchen and out the door.

Once outside, I slowed to a fast walk and continued to make my way to school. I glanced over at Joan's house when I passed it, I just couldn't resist. However, there was no sign of Alex. He must have already left. I couldn't decide if I was happy or sad about that. I quickly shook my head in an attempt to banish Alex from my thoughts and continued to make my way to school.

I was making good progress. I passed the park, the café… I felt a small stab of pain when I walked passed that. That was where Alex and I had gone the first morning we walked to school together. That wasn’t even that long ago but things were so different now.  I was with Brian anyway. I mean I was happy and all with Brian but it still upset me that Alex seemed to hate me right now.  Why was Alex so annoyed and upset about that anyway? He told me he didn’t care who I dated. It all made no sense.

I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket so I pulled it out. I had one voicemail, three missed calls, and seven texts. Oops. The two missed calls and voicemail were from Brian last night. I’d been in such a crappy mood I’d totally forgotten to call him. Most of the texts were from Sophie saying things like “Where are you?!” or “You’re late!!”  And I had one from Brian saying he was worried about me and I was to call him. Aw, that was so sweet. I didn’t bother replying to any of them because I was almost at school so there’d be no point.

And no sooner than I’d stuffed my phone back in my pocket I was at school. I hurried inside the gate and made my way into the main building. I chucked my bag in my locker and took out my books for first period. I was five minutes late but thankfully I had French so it wouldn’t matter. Madame Hastings was pretty laid back and she liked me so it was all good. I slipped into class and murmured a “sorry, I’m late” before making my way to the back of the classroom and sitting down next to Lauren.