Having to choose had never been my thing, how could you possibly choose among those three beautiful women, have you seen their adorable eyes? I bet not, because even you couldn't choose among them. So I came up with the perfect idea.
"Anna I'm going for lunch with you." They all looked at me puzzled, I continued, "Alice I'll see you after work." Anna and Sky gave me death glares but I just ignored their looks. "And then for you my princess, we are gonna have a sleepover." Sky's face lightened up immediately and she enveloped me into a hug. "We have a lot to catch up to." She whispered into my ear and kissed my cheek in the process. "It's getting late beautiful, we should go for lunch." Anna spoke up while tagging on my hand.
"Have a nice lunch Val." Alice said with a hurt expression on her face. "See you later Alice." I tried to enlighten her mood with a hug which she smiled at.
I kissed my best friend's cheek last time wishing her a nice lunch too and then walked off hand in hand with my boss to the elevator.
Once the elevator door closed, Anna came extremely closer to me getting my breath to hitch into my throat making me swallow hard which she laughed lightly at while tracing my lips.
"Are you in love with your best friend?" She asked me the question I loathed to answer so I looked at my feet and replied to her with an inaudible "no"
"Louder beautiful, are you in love with her?" She questioned again. "She's married, does it matter if I love her or not?" I replied a little bit rudely. Skylar was my world but it was evaporating right on my watch and I had nothing to do to stop it.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you, but to reassure you, I'm not leaving you for anyone not even for your little best friend." She caressed my cheek and then the elevator door opened signaling us to our destination.
We had lunch in total silence and then left the restaurant. "Why were you not answering my calls?" A question I avoided was shot my way. "I don't receive my cellphone during working hours Ms. Williams."
I didn't want to complicate things more than they already were, I wanted to start putting some boundaries between me and my boss.
It was no lie, I liked Anna but I liked Alice too and I loved Sky.
"Don't get cocky with me Ms. Victoria, when your finger was inside me I don't remember you calling me Ms. Williams and it's not starting now." I might have struck a nerve because she sounded pissed by the way she was shouting at me and gripping the steering wheel, but it was the right thing to do, keeping my distance though in a close proximity.
I was not supposed to be loved by anyone but Sky, it had always been that way and I didn't want to change it. People were already used of my affection with Skylar but involving another person was going to make them more suspicious than they already were towards my sexual orientation.
"We should keep a professional relationship Ms. Williams." She slammed the brakes, turned the car and then drove off the road parking in the middle of nowhere.
We were parked in the wilderness for quite a while and no one dared to say anything. We were in a certain kind of deafening silence and I had to break it.
"Have you brought me here to get me killed?" I looked at my boss quizzically but instead of giving me a response water just flowed down her cheeks from her eyes.
I hated seeing people I cared about cry but I shouldn't show it, so instead I balled my hands into fists and tried keeping my composure.
"I love you Val, I never knew what love felt like until you showed up, I had never experienced it, I've never let anyone in since she left my dad with me at a very young age, I never believed in love until you came along, the first day I saw you, I thought I just wanted a random hook up with you but I guess I was wrong because I never stopped thinking about you. I've tried pushing you at the back of my head but all in vain, I've tried ignoring those feelings but it's not working, will you please teach me how to stop loving you, because it hurts." She spoke between sobs breaking the high walls I was trying to build around myself and instead kissed her lips gently while wiping away her tears.
She held my hand and directed it to her wet, moist, forbidden spot. "Tell me that you don't want the feeling of my wetness on your fingers, tell me so that I can stop loving you, just say that you don't feel the same way and I'll find a way to giveup on you, just say it." Instead of saying anything I just slid my finger through her folds and the erotic sound she produced was addicting that I craved for more.
My phone ringing was the only thing that ruined the moment, I mumbled a silent apology and dag my phone from my pockets.
"Come home right now, something urgent came up." My sister's rushed voice echoed through my phone.
"Everything okay?" Anna asked. "Can you drive me home right now? I think something wrong happened but I don't know what it is." I gave her the address and she started the engine with no hesitation after composing herself and drove me off to my mother's house.
"Can I come with you?" She asked me while caressing my thigh but whatever was going on home had to be faced by only me. It was my cross to carry.
"It's okay, just drive safe." I kissed her goodbye and moved out of the car, I watched her driving off and then braced myself for whatever awaited me on the other side of the door.
I stood on the doorway for quite a while, and then mustered all my courage and knocked on the door.
I remembered the last time Sam called me like that was when I had hit the bully who had tormented Sky for a while and then ran off.
I wished myself luck before entering inside the house.
The door busted open revealing my not so happy sister followed by my obviously pissed mum _I wondered what I had done that time round, I didn't remember hitting anyone, oh, I hit Richard Watson, could that be the reason! But I was defending my boss._
I left my trance when I got yanked by the ear aggressively inside by none other than my angry mum and my sister shut the door behind us.
My mum looked at me like I had killed her precious cat, she slapped me across the face and I staggered a little bit _it seemed liked what I had done that time was a capital offense since my mom had never been that upset with me, she was looking at me like a world's number one criminal. I wanted to ask what the crime was but my mouth didn't badge with me._
A picture of me kissing Anna was flashed into my face staring back at me, displayed on my mother's phone screen. Wait, who took that picture? Someone clearly was stalking me, that picture was taken a few minutes ago in the woods when I was with Anna._public notice!!!! I had a stalker._
"Do you recognize that face?" My mom asked me but I was too stunned to utter a word. Another slap staggered me and I blinked back tears. It wasn't the right time for my hormones to get the better of me, I had to get a grip, I had to say something.
"I I ah....... Do....nt" I started stammering and another slap echoed in the house _if I were white my cheek would be crimson red or even purple at the moment._
"Who's the woman you were doing the evil deed with?" My mom shouted at me but I couldn't tell them that it was my hot boss lady.
The way the picture was taken, you could only recognize my face since Anna's face was covered with her hair and it was taken from the back view of her mainly focusing on my face.
"Answer me Valerie." My mum demanded for answers but I didn't have any response, it was clearly the end of me and dragging someone with me was not a good idea either. Another slap on my cheek echoed through the house. "You should answer me now Valerie." My mom's voice cracked and tears started falling freely down her cheeks. _I didn't mean all of that to happen, I let my feelings control me, my mom was crying because I had failed her as a daughter, but how could I possibly change my heart? How could I command my heart to stop beating fast around women?__
"Call the authority Samantha, I don't wanna see this imbecile good for nothing dyke's face anymore." _Rest in peace Valerie Victoria_, tears started flowing from my eyes, I was very much aware that my death was around the corner. They never pardoned anyone. Every single day, lesbians and gays were hung to death by the angry mob, the authority could hand those innocent souls to the mobs and let them deal with them. I knew that one day I had to die but not in the hands of a homophobic ignorant mob.
"Mum there's this Convent which treats lesbianism, how about we take her there?" My sister voiced out, I was aware that she was also worried about my death like I was.
"I'll decide tomorrow, what to do with her, we can even consider throwing her in the desert and she starves to death but right now I'm still processing that my own daughter is now one of them. She is among the sinners, she's going to rot in hell with her good for nothing father. I always warned that man to not raise my daughter with masculinity but he didn't listen. Now see how things have turned up." My mom spoke with bitterness causing my tears to fall, my mom looked at me like a monster.
I never woke up one day and chose those kind of feelings.
I had fought them to a point where I couldn't anymore, why couldn't they understand that not everyone wanted a traditional family, at the end of the day we were all humans looking for survival, with the same blood but different preferences. Our bodies are a shell of our souls of which one day the soul will leave our shell leaving it to rot on earth. I wondered what the fuss of who we chose to sleep with was all about.
"Go to your room, I don't wanna look at your silly face, you disgust me. Dyke." My mom spat venomous words directly into my heart. I walked dejectedly into my bedroom and closed myself there. I laid down on my bed and started crying a river. I wondered what I had done wrong to God to possess me with those kind of feelings. I also wanted to be normal but I guess normal was not meant for everyone.
I not only loved Sky, I liked Anna and Alice too.
I cried my heart out, I couldn't call the girls and tell them the kind of d茅ja vu I was in right at that moment because I didn't want to worry either of them.
I was so useless to myself and everyone around me.
I drifted off to sleep with a heavy heart, I didn't feel the need to clean my body when my heart was full of wounds probably scared that I would hurt my heart even more.
