𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐋𝐎𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐘, carrington

009. fortnight

february 10th, 2024
C A M I L A

NOW PLAYING:
CEILINGS
l. mcalpine

it's been a few weeks since me and calvin have been talking to each other, and it's safe to say i've never felt more happy and content.

i've barely even thought about carrington, he hasn't tried to text me, i haven't seen him in person, it's been amazing (or at least that's what i've been telling myself).

i really like calvin, talking to him makes me really happy, and i know that's true but what i don't know is if i like like him. i don't want to start dating and get into something serious with calvin if inside me i am still not over carrington.

but maybe a relationship is just what i need to get over him, make me forget him for real, right? but i couldn't do that to calvin, he's way too sweet i could never use him or use anyone like that.

or am i just trying to convince myself i'm still in love with carrington, a girl never forgets her first love. or in a way maybe i don't really like like anyone and i am just convincing myself i am.

all reasonably explanations, but i need to figure out what's happening before i end up hurting myself or calvin. my thoughts get interrupted when i start to hear my phone ring.

"hey girl" one of my closest friends, tara yummy bubbly speaks through the phone. i laugh a little at her enthusiasm at seven in the morning "what's up tara" i reply matching her energy.

"i think i'm gonna throw a party tonight, you in?" she asks me as i start to consider my answers. i could either stay home and watch the note book well eating cool ranch doritos on the couch for the third night in a row, or i could come to the party.

"hm, who's coming it's kinda late notice" i tell her "girl this is LA, i'm calling everyone right now so probably a lot of people" she pauses for a moment, "carrington is gonna be there, he's my best friends roommate, i understand if you don't come but i really think you should. it's been awhile and it's time for you guys to get your closure"

i sigh and look down at my phone, i was hoping she wouldn't mention him. i gulp, "can i bring daph and lavender" if i was going to this party i at least needed them.

"of course you can! oh em gee i haven't seen them in so long! and if you want you can bring calvin" she quickly adds at the end. "maybe i will, what time should i be there"

"you can come early if you want, but people will start showing up around eight, it's at my friends house by the way, she lives right on the beach it's going to be amazing" i can basically feel her excitement through the phone.

'*•.¸ ♡ ¸.•*'

the smell of vodka and weed is starting to make my head hurt, or maybe it was the ponding music, at this point i wasn't sure. i've been at tara's party for around three hours and fortunately i haven't bumped into carrington.

i wish i could just forget him for one night, just have fun instead of being paranoid he's around every corner. i start thinking with my feet and walk into the kitchen, and start pouring myself straight vodka into four shot glasses.

i take them back to back, needing to loosen up. i walk back out to the living room and start dancing with whoever is around me. i didn't really know what was going on around me but i was having fun, which is what i wanted so i was okay.

'*•.¸ ♡ ¸.•*'

i think it had been an hour? i've lost track of time by now. the world feels dizzy and i know i need to get out of the over crowded room before i pass out.
i start stumbling to the door, wanting to get out.

little did i know a certain pair of blue eyes that have been watching me all night, waiting to talk to me followed me out.

dee speaks!

sigh.

IM SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SORRYYYY

this month was crazz!! i had my birthday, then a vaction, and reconnected with old friends and just not been on my phone too much since it's summer!!!!

this is a short chap i wrote on the road trip home bc i haven't posted in foreverrrrr i hope it keeps you well because i have a plan for the next chapter!!

i'm truly sorry, please vote though🥳