Friday Night Dinner's

16.

(Santana's POV)

The time has come, I am sat at my dining table counting down the minutes until Brittany will be ringing the buzzer. I have five minutes, five minutes left with my thoughts, five minutes until I have to face the music, five minutes until I have to undoubtedly answer some uncomfortable questions. 

I arrived back in the city early this morning, headed straight to the offices to work, but my mind has been out of the game all day, every waking moment of today my mind has been on this meeting with Brittany. I just about managed to get my shit together enough to sign off on the final few details of our PRIME deal, our biggest deal of the year. But work soon came and went and 16:00pm rolled around and I caught the subway home ready to meet Brittany. 

In all the years of friendship I have never ever felt like this, felt such a mix of emotions to see my best friend. If I can even call her that now? When I knew I would be seeing Britt, I used to feel nothing other than elation and joy. But right now, in this moment I am anxious, nervous and quite honestly...a little sick. The thought that we might not be able to return to how we were petrifies me, I might be about to lose my best friend in the whole world. It not only affects us, but the group too. We have been such a strong unit for so so so many years and that could all be over within the next couple of hours. Also, Gia...my lovely, beautiful, kind and caring Gia. What do I do with that situation? I don't want to break her heart, she is such a pure and amazing soul and doesn't deserve to be hurt, I am not even sure if I want to hurt her? Meaning, I don't know if I want to end things with her? 

Two minutes to go...

(Brittany's POV)

I step out of the cab outside Santana's apartment building, I haven't seen Santana for a while. I have absolutely no idea how this is all going to end. Will I have a Santana in my life by the end of this talk? Will things be the same again? I have no idea. And that thought terrifies me through and through. So much is at stake here, so many years of strong and solid friendship is hanging by a literal thread. I know in my heart who I love, that is Santana. Mia and that whole thing is something separate for me to deal with, it isn't right that I am stringing her along, she knows something is up. I am a decent human being, so regardless of how this goes there is a conversation to be had there, for my sake as well as hers. 

I cross the street and head to the entrance of Santana's building. "I'm here for Miss Lopez" I say to the doorman who lets me into her building. I take a deep breath and take my time walking across her lobby to the elevator. I have two minutes to prepare myself. I feel like everything I want to say and ask Santana is swirling around in my mind so quickly I can't think straight, or put a simple plan in place in my mind and I know it will only get worse. As soon as I see Santana, I am almost sure it will all fall out of my mind and I will draw a blank. Do I let her just talk? Do I say what I want to say then let her respond? I do not know. In all of the years Santana and I have been friends, I have never felt this apprehensive to see her. 

I press the button that will take me to Santana's floor, I lean against the back of the elevator taking several deep breaths, I can keep my heart pounding against my ribcage, beating harder and fasters as I watch the floor levels going up and up on the sign in the elevator. The suddenly, ping! I have arrived on Santana's floor. The doors open in what feels like slow motion as I take a cautious step out. I give myself a moment or two for some extra composure as I take the smallest steps known to man to her door.

(Santana's POV)

There is a small but assertive knock at the door. My stomach flips and drops, she's here. I get up from the table, straighten my clothes out and walk to the front door. I feel my body begin to shake a little as I reach for the handle. I quickly glance through the peep hole, she looks as nervous as I do, which brings me a little comfort. One last deep breath and I open my door in one swift motion.