[ON HOLD] 36 Students in a Classroom

15. I totally meant wheaties. Totally.

          15. THE ONE WHO'S TAKING OVER YOUR LIFE

Okay . . . maybe the title's a bit extreme.

But there's a point, I promise.

These people are not always found in a class. Sometimes they are, sometimes they're not.

But I sure had one of these people in my class.

The person I described in the title there, Clona, is someone who can do everything you can do. But, even if it's not true, you seem to believe Clona does it better.

If you're a good singer, she's a great one.

If you're a great dancer, she's an excellent one.

If you're an excellent artist, she's already sold five thousand paintings, two hundred pastel drawings and won a gold medal for her latest sketch because it cured a diseased woman.

You look at Clona, and she kind of reminds you of yourself, except to you she seems to be better.

It might take you a while to realize, but when you see it, you begin constantly comparing yourself to her.

And why do you compare yourself to this person?

Because she or he overshadows you in everything.

One day you could be singing in a crowd of people while everyone applauds, and the next day Clona's on national television getting a record deal, and when she comes back to school she gets a whole section of the school building named after her.

Clona is so similar to you that she's practically your clone.

. . . See what I did there? Clone. Clona.

Anyone.

. . . Moving on.

So yes, after a long period of speculation, I discovered something that all people should know about the Clona in their lives.

Clona is determined to take over your life.

She's really an alien species that descended from the sky after years and years of searching for a new planet. She is dangerous, she is deadly, and she will eat you. But she likes to eat attractive people. So luckily I'm safe.

Kidding.

Kind of.

She has assumed this new identity to infiltrate our countries and take over the━

Well, you get the gist. She's evil.

I may have slightly exaggerated the details as to why she's evil, but that is entirely irrelevant.

After seeing Clona's personality match yours, you start to feel like the only way to get rid of that annoying voice in your head telling you that she's better than you is to beat her.

With a bat.

Also kidding.

Kind of.

So now every time you do anything, or she does anything, you can't help but feel like you and Clona are in a competition. You can't help but want to beat her.

Without the bat this time.

But I have one thing to say to you, all you Clona attackers.

Don't kill her. Because then you'll end up in jail or a youth detention center if you're under eighteen and some other person stuck in there with you will break your arms and force feed you horse radish for the rest of your life.

. . . I don't actually know where that one came from . . .

Probably went a little overboard on the whiskey--I mean the wheaties this morning.

These wording issues of mine are getting worse. I'm mistaking wheaties for whiskey now. I'm totally secretly evil. Man, maybe I should be in a youth detention center.

. . . No. Nope. Can't do it. I hate horse radish.

Eat your wheaties, children. Don't drink alcohol. Don't do drugs.

And whatever you do, do not tell anyone that there is a monkey planning world domination in my basement.

. . . Because, you know. You'd be lying. I mean you'd be totally making everything up. I mean you know . . . it's not true, so like, just . . . um.

So back to Clona, um.

Listen, sometimes it's hard to stop comparing yourself to other people. But please, don't compare yourself to Clona. It'll drive you crazy.

In this world, there will always be someone out there who's better at something than you. Someone who plays your sport better than you do. Someone who plays an instrument better than you. Someone who gets better grades than you in school.

But you have to remember. Just because you think someone is better than you doesn't mean they actually are. Whoever Clona is, she has made mistakes before, just like you have. She's not perfect. And it might seem like she's taking over your life but she's actually not. Because she's not you.

She can never be you.

And she might be your Clona, but she has one too. She has someone out there who's better at something than she is. And that person has a Clona too.

That's just how things are. And it might suck from time to time, but you have to realize that you shouldn't be striving to be better in order to beat someone else. Because if that's how you live you will never be satisfied.

So do me a favor and just be the best version of yourself that you can be, for you. It would be a shame to see all the talents of the world go to waste.

* * *

HI. HOLA. BON JOUR.

AAANNDDD THAT CONCLUDES THE NUMBER OF LANGUAGES I CAN SAY HELLO IN.

This chapter was more of a motivational one than a funny one, huh?

Oh well. Gotta love a good pep talk.

On a side note: You might realize that even though I wrote this as a middle schooler, some of the chapters in the book have things in them that seem recent (like when I mentioned Obama) and that's because I add things in as I revise my old writings. Just to clear things up a bit.

So yeah I know I totally disappeared on you guys. Sorry. I'll stick around for longer this time. c;

P.S. I also updated Model in Disguise. Click the external link!

'AwesomelyBlaze