Blood in the Water

Thanks and Giving

It was fall break which was very nice. The leaves had finally changed. I lit my pumpkin cinnamon candle with a nice slice of buttered pumpkin bread sitting next to it, ready to eat.

"Last day before I put up Christmas decor," I thought.

Lovely Lace was closed today so I spent the day cuddled up with Connor watching Gilmore Girls. Once the day faded away I changed into a brown sweater with flared jeans. My mom drove us to the Monroe's for the biggest meal of the year. I brought the pie.

It smelled so good when we walked through the door. "Hiiii," they greeted us. I hugged everyone. We all set our dishes in the kitchen and then packed plates with food. We all sat down at the perfectly decorated table. It had leaves spread everywhere with pretty candles lit. We took turns saying what we were grateful for, starting with Lydia.

"I am grateful for my family and friends," she said.

It shifted to Lucas.

"I am grateful that I found Karly this year," he smiled at her.

It kept going until it got to me.

"I am grateful to be here and still breathing. I am also grateful that Alabama is looking good," I said.
"I am grateful for the amazing opportunities that are coming," added Connor.

The rest of the table went and then we dug in. Tonight at midnight was the moment we all found out if we got into Alabama. I was so fearful that I tuned out the rest of the dinner conversations. Connor and Jackson already knew their fate, but what was mine? What if I don't make it? What if that tears Connor and me apart? All these thoughts ran through my head.

Eventually, we excused ourselves from the meal. The kids all went downstairs and watched Gossip Girl to pass the time. 11:30 finally came around so Lydia and I started pacing. We grabbed our computers and all set them up. This determined everything about my future. We all talked about how amazing it would be if we all got accepted. The time slowly passed. We paused the show and opened our email. Once the clock hit midnight I refreshed my page.

I saw the email. The email that determined my fate. I took a deep breath and clicked on the email. I skimmed through the unimportant stuff. I wasn't breathing until I saw accepted in green letters. Lydia and the other boys must have seen at the same time because we all jumped up screaming and hugging. Somehow everyone made it. The acceptance rate was high but I was unsure we all could do it. I was crying happy tears. The five of us would be together for an additional four years of our lives. My life just got so much easier.

"Okay, Connor we can go now," I celebrated.
"Let's go, bama baby!"

     We crawled into my mom's car, exhausted. I ran my fingers around the dash, feeling for anything real. The whole acceptance thing sent me into a state of disassociation.

"I need to hang out with my parents. I'll drop you home on my way," he added.
"Thanks, babe."

    He pulled into our cracked driveway. I hopped out of the car and felt the cool breeze on the only exposed skin I had. I could see my breath come out in clouds of smoke. I waved goodbye to the car exiting the driveway. My mom was waiting on the couch. She was tapping her fingers, which meant she had something to say. It couldn't be good. I hung my coat up in the laundry room and took a deep breath in. I tried to walk past her, avoiding the word vomit about to fall out of her mouth.

"Alyssa?"
"Yeah, mom."

     I took a seat on the old, hard couch. She didn't take any time.

"Don't you think you are getting a little big?" She asked me, sincerely.