The Force Helped Me Find Myself.

Chapter 2

When Dad got home, he told me that we were having an important visitor tomorrow night. I was excited to see the master again. Then Dad said that Emmi and her family would be joining us, I could barely contain my excitement. I had a message from Emmi not long after saying the same thing. I was so excited I let out a little squeal, mum gave me a funny look when I did. She wasn't upset or angry, more like surprised that I had done that then sad I hadn't spoken to her about it. I wasn't ready to talk to her though.

The next day I could barely concentrate I was so excited. Emmi and I would chat about what happened the day before and what it meant whenever we were alone. She said she had a little trouble with the blocks but did well otherwise. She said something else that surprised me. She described the master as feeling different to me and different to her father and older brother. I suggested it was because they were neither male nor female. She said that's what the master said.

That afternoon when I got home, I decided to wear my nice pants and shirt. That's what my parents called it, but I never felt they were that nice, unlike some of my sister's nice outfits. Mum and Dad dressed up too, we all knew this was important. Not long after Dad got home, Emmi and her family arrived. She looked amazing in her dress and the rest of her family looked great too, it was the best I'd seen her brother look. I was a little jealous of Emmi, I wished I could wear something that pretty.

"Hi Emmi, you look amazing."

"Thanks, Jo, you look quite spiffy yourself."

"Yeah, thanks," I said a little bit flat.

"Girl, I know you would rather wear something like this, but right now you look good. Hopefully, in the future, you can be your complete self."

"Thanks, Emmi, I hope you're right."

Mum had organised some food for the evening, and my sister and I helped her set everything up with Emmi offering to help, but we had enough people get the job done quickly.

Right on time, there was a knock on the door. I quickly went with Emmi to open the door.

"Good evening young ones, it's good to see you."

"It's good to see you too Master Ali," I said with a slight bow.

"Please just call me Ali tonight. We don't need to be so formal."

"Ok, we'll try," Emmi and I said in unison, then giggled because of it.

"You two have a strong bond. Friendships like that are particularly important. I'll do my best to help you to keep that connection." They moved through the door, followed by a Cathar female dressed similarly to the master. "This is my assistant, Juhani, she is learning how to interact better with people outside of the academy."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, mam. I've never met a Cathar before," I said with as much respect as I could."

"Thank you young one. It's good to meet both of you too. My family moved here when I was quite young so my dad could learn about the culture of the Gungan's. He teaches at a university in Theed and is an expert in his field."

"Wow, that's cool. I'd like to meet him in the future. I'd love to learn more about the Gungan's. I would like to know more about your people in the future as well," said Emmi with me nodding along in agreement.

"That might be possible in the future. If you both attend the academy, there will be plenty of time to learn from each other." We nodded excitedly and showed them to the dining area.

After introductions, we sat down and discussed the purpose of the Jedi's visit over the food prepared. We learned that we were both force-sensitive, which we knew by that point, and were offered a place at the academy for the remainder of our formal schooling until we were adults.

"I want to make something very clear," said the master, "we operate much like any other boarding school. Your children can come home for holidays and time off from school. We encourage you to maintain a good relationship with your children. We have learned a lot from the mistakes of the past and have made changes to the old ways. The biggest difference between our academy and other schools is that we will teach your children how to feel the force and how to control their abilities. If they wish, they can learn to be full Jedi when they graduate, and they will learn all the academic requirements of any other school. After meeting both of them yesterday and spending time with them today, I feel they will benefit greatly from this opportunity and will be an asset in whatever field they choose to pursue."

My mum looked at them with a disbelieving eye, "Are you sure my son is capable of doing this? I've never seen anything from him to suggest he's capable of being a Jedi."

"Mum, I can. I've hidden from you because I was worried about how you would react." To prove my point, I moved a piece of fruit from my plate to be presented to Mum, without my hands. It hung in the air until she took it.

Mum's eyes were wide, and Dad looked shocked, my sister smiled. "Oh, um, right. I guess you can Josen. I wish you had told me sooner."

"I'm sorry mum. I didn't know what you would say. You often seem sad when I share things with you."

"I'm sorry honey. I don't mean to. I love you but worry about you. I don't know you and what I do makes me worry for you." I hugged Mum and promised to talk to her more until I go to school next year.

The evening ended with our parents getting a lot of information about the school and a way to enrol us in the school. Then our parents sent us to a different room so they could talk.

"That seems like a great school," said Emmi.

"Yeah, it does. I hope Mum will go for it."

"I'm sure she will. I'm sure the master will be convincing them to let us go."

"I hope they don't try to scare her into letting me go. It won't work."

"I'm sure they know that."

It took close to an hour before the adults had stopped talking. We said goodbye to the Jedi, and then Emmi and her family went home. While I got ready for bed, Mum came in to talk to me.

"Hi Josen, how are you feeling about all of this."

"I'm good mum, excited actually. Emmi and I have been friends for ages, we bonded over being different to everyone else. Now I have an opportunity to learn more about myself and do great things in the future."

"I'm glad you're happy. I just wish you had spoken to me sooner. It came as a bit of a surprise. It's like I don't really know you."

"I'm sorry Mum, I didn't mean for that to happen. I just didn't know what would happen if I told you. I love you and I didn't want anything to happen that would stop you from loving me."

"Honey, that would never happen, even if you turn evil, I'd still love you. There is something else that the Jedi mentioned about you that surprised me."

"Oh, what is that?"

"They said that you might be a girl. Is that what you think?"

"Um, I think so yes. Emmi and I are like girl friends. She has said many times I don't feel like her dad and brother, but I feel like the girls at school and my sister, more like Kriy than anyone."

Mum looked at me seriously, "ok, so the force shows you as feminine?"

"That's what it seems to be, yes. There's more than that though. I am so jealous of Emmi, Kriy, and the other girls at school. Emmi looked so cute tonight in her dress, I wished I could be that cute. Kriy has so many things that I wish I could have too or that I could have done. I don't get the boys and I never feel like one of them. I'm sorry, I'm just not a boy."

I started to tear up, mum came and hugged me. "Honey, it's okay. You are who you are. I still love you and so does your dad. We'll see what we can do to help you, but it might take until the end of the school year before we can do much."

"That's ok mum and thank you. I was scared you wouldn't accept me."

"We will always be here for honey. Now go to bed, you have school tomorrow."

I had a great sleep, dreaming of being in a great dress, presenting to a crowd about something I didn't recognise, with my lightsaber in a large pocket of my dress, not that I should need it there.