(Trigger warning)
I scream then I collapse to the floor in tears.
Nick comes running in, when he sees me on the floor in tears, he rushes down beside me and holds me.
"Y/n, what happened, please tell me." Nick asks, making me cry harder. "Sh-sh-sh-sh-he's gone." I stammer and cry even harder.
"Who is?" Nick asks me, worried. "Mom." Was the only word I was able to get out, before crying again.
"I talked to your mom yesterday she's fine." Nick said.
"NO NICK, SHE GOT SHOT IN THE HEAD, AND MY GRANDMA WENT INTO A COMA BECAUSE SHE WAS IN A CRASH." I scream at Nick before crying again.
"Y/n..." Nick pauses. At this point I'm crying so bad to where I'm heaving and I can't breath, Nick cuddles up next to me on the floor, telling me to calm down or breath.
I calm down after about an hour or so but my mind is just crazy, it's 1 am in the morning and Nick is asleep. I look at Nick, he looks so peaceful.
I walk into the bathroom and look at myself.
I'm so ugly, and fat, honestly what am I even doing on earth, my parents are dead, my grandmas in a coma. All of my friends probably think I'm crazy, especially Nick.
I look over and see my pencil sharpener. I also see a screw driver. I unscrew the blade, and drag it across my skin, feeling the warm blood trickling down my arm.
I didn't feel pain, but I felt relief. After that I washed up and got into bed and went to sleep.
I wake up to find Nick still sleeping, I look at my arms and I think how am I supposed to cover the cuts.
I decided to wear a long sleeve shirt so no one would find out.
I get out of bed and go into the living room and cut on the tv.
"Hey." I hear a raspy voice that belongs to Nick say. "Hi." I say emotionlessly.
I remember I need to clean up the bathroom so I rush past Nick and go clean up.
Just in time too, just as soon as I hid the blade in my pocket Nick came in the bathroom.
"Hey you okay, you seem a little panicked this morning." Nick asks me.
"Yeah I'm fine." I say shakily. "You sure?" Nick asked. "Yes." I say and exit the bathroom.
It's around lunch time now and Nick is making lunch, while I just sit and look down at my feet.
"Hey lunch is ready." Nick says sitting beside me with his plate. "I'm not very hungry right now." I say looking at Nick's food.
I hold my mouth and try not to throw up.
"Y/n, there has to be something wrong, you never wear long sleeves, even in winter, you're always hungry especially when I make spaghetti, but when I even mention food you look like you're about to throw up. What's wrong?" Nick asks.
"It's nothing I'm honestly fine." I lie straight though my teeth.
"Look, I know your mom died, and your grandmas in a coma, but even when your dad died you still ate." Nick tells me. "I'm just not hungry that's all." I say and walk into the bedroom.
It's been 3 days since my mom died and I've been cutting every night, I also haven't been eating, but I drink water now and then.
"Y/n, you haven't eaten in 3 days, you have to eat something." Nick begs me to eat.
