The sin of loving you(Bokuaka ff)

Chapter 8: Against the tide

The church was bustling with activity as the congregation gathered for the evening service. The grand hall, usually filled with solemn hymns and peaceful prayers, now felt like a stage where Akaashi was to play his part in an uncomfortable drama. The air was thick with the scent of incense and the murmur of whispered conversations.

Akaashi sat on a wooden pew, the weight of the past few days heavy on his shoulders. The sermon had been long and unforgiving, with fire-and-brimstone rhetoric that seemed aimed directly at him. The pastor's words echoed in his mind, casting doubt and guilt over his every thought.

The time finally came for the ceremony. Akaashi approached the baptismal font, the cool water reflecting the harsh lights of the church. The pastor stood by, his face a mask of stern righteousness. Akaashi took a deep breath and stepped into the font, his heart pounding with anxiety and a profound sense of dread.

As the pastor recited the prayers and dipped his head into the water, Akaashi felt an odd mixture of relief and emptiness. He had hoped that this ritual would somehow absolve him of his feelings, but instead, it only served to deepen his internal conflict. He emerged from the water feeling no different—still burdened, still conflicted.

The congregation's whispers grew louder as Akaashi dried himself and returned to his seat. The word "sinner" floated through the murmurs, and he could feel the sting of judgment. His parents seemed to believe that this act would erase everything, but Akaashi knew better. The feelings he had for Bokuto were still there, still as real as they had been before.

Later that night, as the church service ended and the building began to empty, Akaashi found himself alone in his room. The quiet of the house was oppressive, a stark contrast to the bustling environment of the church. He lay on his bed, staring at the ceiling, the weight of his parents' expectations and the church's judgment pressing down on him.

A soft knock on his window startled him. Akaashi sat up, his heart skipping a beat. He hesitated for a moment before moving to the window and opening it slightly. Bokuto's face appeared in the dim light, his expression a mix of concern and determination.

"Hey," Bokuto said softly, his voice carrying a sense of urgency. "Can we talk?"

Akaashi's heart ached at the sight of him. He glanced back into his room, conflicted. He wanted to let Bokuto in, to explain everything, but he also feared what would happen next. He knew his parents would be furious if they found out.

"I don't know if this is a good idea," Akaashi whispered, glancing nervously toward the door to make sure his parents wont walk in.

"Please," Bokuto pleaded, his eyes searching Akaashi's. "I need to talk to you. It's important."

After a moment of hesitation, Akaashi nodded and carefully opened the window wider. Bokuto climbed through, his movements quick but cautious. He landed softly on the floor and stood there, looking at Akaashi with a mixture of relief and sadness.

"I'm glad you came," Akaashi said quietly. "I needed to talk to someone."

Bokuto's eyes softened with concern. "I heard you'd been avoiding me, and I wanted to make sure you're okay. I don't know what's been going on, but... are you alright?"

Akaashi sighed, the burden of his recent experiences heavy on him. "It's been hard," he admitted. "Today... today I was re-baptized at church."

Bokuto's eyes widened in surprise. "Re-baptized? Why? What happened?"

Akaashi's gaze fell to the floor. "My parents think that if I go through the ceremony, it'll cleanse me of... my 'sin.' They think it'll make everything right."

Bokuto's brow furrowed in confusion and concern. "What do you mean? What did they do?"

Akaashi took a deep breath, trying to steady his voice. "They believe that my feelings for you, for anyone of the same gender, are a sin. They made me go through this whole ritual, and I had to listen to the pastor's harsh words about how wrong it is. The congregation was whispering, judging me. It was... humiliating."

Bokuto's expression turned to one of shock and anger. "That's awful, Akaashi. I'm so sorry. I didn't know it was this bad."

"It is," Akaashi said, his voice trembling. "And it's not just the church. My parents took away my phone and grounded me. They're trying to make me 'understand' why I'm wrong, but I don't feel any different. It doesn't change how I feel about you."

Bokuto stepped closer, placing a comforting hand on Akaashi's shoulder. "You don't have to go through this alone. I'm here for you, no matter what."

Akaashi looked up at Bokuto, his eyes filled with uncertainty. "I'm starting to come to terms with my feelings, but it's hard. I'm scared, and I don't know what to do next."

Bokuto gave him a reassuring smile. "It's okay to be scared. You don't have to have all the answers right now. Just know that you don't have to hide from me. I care about you, and I want to help you through this."

Akaashi nodded slowly, feeling a small glimmer of hope amidst the confusion. "Thank you, Bokuto. It means a lot to me."

As Bokuto prepared to leave, he turned to Akaashi with a gentle smile. "We'll get through this together. One step at a time."

Akaashi watched Bokuto leave through the window, a sense of relief and newfound determination settling within him. The path ahead was still uncertain, but for the first time, he felt a small measure of hope. With Bokuto's support, he knew he wasn't completely alone in his struggle.