KGOMOTSO: HIS FIRST

Chapter 7

SIMPHIWE

I decided to spend the night and rest of my off weekend in my mother's apartment since I've never been here before. I didn't want to witness that cringe relationship between my dad and Nomasonto.

Unfortunately Sihle couldn't come with because Lydia didn't want her son near my mother. That's how petty she is. It was just me and my mom, watching a Tyler Perry movie over some pizza. Just how I like it. I've learnt to know that my mom loves simple things.

I found her staring at me with a smile. That's weird.

Mama: "I've never seen you so focused on the TV."

Simphiwe: "This movie is just interesting, Ma. That's all. Are you doubting me?"

Mama: "No. It's just... I've realised I've never got to bond with you, as my son."

Simphiwe: "When did you realise all this?"

Mama: "Last month on your birthday. The happiness and the excitement you got when you were learning how to drive. You kept asking me 'Am I doing it right Ma?' Later when you left, I felt a wave of guilt and I realised that I never got to spend some time with you as my son."

I didn't know how to feel or what to do at this point.

Simphiwe: "Mama. Don't feel guilty. I mean, all this is also new to me. But I just want to enjoy the little time I have with you."

I just didn't want to get all emotional. Not tonight.
And plus, why would one cry when a Madea movie is playing?
No.

After a while I slowly lay on my mother's lap like I always did on my grandmother's. I've longed for this motherly feel for a long time and now that I'm experiencing it, it's warm. Unusual, but warm. She slowly rubbed my head and I slowly started falling asleep.

KGOMOTSO

It's midnight. What could Simphiwe be doing that's making him SMS me at this time. I'm even supposed to be asleep because it's lights out, but here I am, covering myself with a blanket, reading his messages. This is so weird and unusual of him. Ayi, I have no words for this human being.

Kgomotso [through text]: "Simphiwe y r u smsing me now" I text him.

Simphiwe [through text]: "Am bored,so cn u pls jst txt me back"

Argh! But it's not like I was tired either, so let me just keep texting him until I fall asleep...

SIMPHIWE

I had been waiting for Kgomotso's message after I asked her about her day. Maybe she fell asleep. I was a bit disappointed because I wanted to tell her my boring day, hoping I'd entertain her but sadly nothing happened.

It's 08AM now. Yeah, she's probably still asleep.

I was up from the minute the sun rose, which was at around 05AM. I was just thinking about how it felt to sleep on my mother's lap. I said it was a motherly feeling, yes, but there's just something man... I don't know what it is, but it felt so unusual. Could it be that I never got experience that feeling as a toddler?

My mom has been busy with work since the day I was born so she never had time to do all those basic motherly stuff as a toddler. So much so that she even sent me to Saint Martins so I won't have to distract both of my parents from their busy lives.
But I was also thinking about another thing; her atheism. Depressing as it is, I have to consider it. I mean, how would she feel that the same Simphiwe she gave birth to as an atheist is the same one that has converted to Christianity? Eish! Should I show her some signs? Should I just leave it to God to show her? What do I do? Or is it too early to show her because she's only started being a mother this year. It's still February. Hm... Maybe I'll wait till later in the year.