Not Like Last Time

Chapter 14

The next day was my last shift before I got my 'weekend.' I felt weirdly proud. I knew the paycheck wouldn't be until next Thursday, but I was still proud.

JJ was back, so everything was much smoother. The day was quiet, but everything was awkward with Jake now. He'd stammer over his words to talk to me, and he wouldn't meet my eyes anymore. It was a mistake, showing him the scars. I knew it was.

I ruined it.

"You don't have to close up today, since JJ's back." He mumbled to me as he put the closed sign on the door.

"Okay." I said. "Jake, stop acting like you have to tread on eggshells with me," I added before I lost the nerve.

"I know." Jake stammered.

"Do you?" I scoff, my hand resting on the doorknob.

I didn't get an answer. I opened the door and walked out, grabbing my bike.

I didn't even get halfway home before Jake's car pulled up beside me with the window down. "You want a ride?"

"No, thanks." When he didn't keep driving I sighed. "You're holding up the car behind you."

"Okay? They can pass me." He said as someone beeped.

I stopped peddling. "Pull over."

He did and sat on the curb next to me.

"I'm sorry." He said, looking down in his lap. "For acting like I was today."

"No, it's not your fault. I shouldn't have showed you the scars so quickly anyways. I should've asked." I mumbled.

"And I shouldn't have reacted the way I did today. It was just..surprising. I knew you were messed up, but..." He trailed off and I finished it for him.

"But you didn't think it would be this."

He nodded.

"Jake..." I didn't really know what to say.

"I know. I won't act like you're a different person anymore."

"Thank you." I replied, folding my hands in my lap. We sat in silence for a bit and then stood. "I should get home."

"Are you sure you don't want a ride?" He asked again, opening his car door.

"I'm sure." I answered. "Bye, Jake."

"Bye, Dealia."

I got home much later than usual and mom raised her eyebrows.

"Don't worry," I told her quickly. "Nothing happened."

"Okay, hun."

There were a few minutes of silence before I finally broke it. "I'm getting my first paycheck next Thursday."

"Really? That's amazing!" Mom grinned, and I couldn't help but let out a smile myself.

"I know. I feel like an adult now. Back pain and everything." I teased, and it felt nice to be able to talk to my mom normally again. If only for a moment.

Though it was my fault for creating an un-normal atmosphere in the first place.

I brushed the thoughts out of my head and helped her make dinner. It was calming. I was never any good at baking or cooking. When I was around 11 or 12, before everything started, I used to joke that I would live off Kraft Mac and Cheese and Ramen.

Then I started thinking about college. I could still go. I just had to finish taking my classes. After I'd come back from Rivers the first time, I retook all my classes over the summer and came back to school as usual. Now I had some free time to take my highschool classes, get my credits, and apply.

I'd probably only wind up in community college, and maybe that was better than some bigger, possibly more stressful college. There was a community college in the town center that I could go to.

I still had a future, it just wouldn't be as bright as it could've been.

But that was my fault too, wasn't it?