Betting On Love ✯ George Russell

🅒🅗🅐🅟🅣🅔🅡 29

♪ No ink, no stain, just permanent pain
You don't break like I do, it's brutal ♪

George Russel POV

It didn't feel good but I had work to do so I handled the whole weekend as best as I could under the circumstances. But I would still like to believe she is running from the truth, or maybe I am the one deluding myself thinking we could ever be anything.

That's how I found myself drunk at the Abu Dhabi after-party. I saw both Nina and Lance coming in my direction, sitting in front of me.

"I'm sorry for what's happening," Nina is clearly sad as she says it, and I shake my head.

"There is no problem; she is the one who fucked up. She can't admit things, not even to herself," I sloppily manage to say.

"We thought this would make you both admit that you've liked each other for years, but she just chose to ignore it again. I don't know what is wrong with her, I swear. I never meant for you to get hurt," she is nervous but I give her a comforting smile.

"I will be fine. She will understand once it's too late. Wait, what do you mean 'we'?" I am now confused.

"I talked to Lance and we thought we should make the stupid bet to see if you two would let your pride aside at the end of it but she clearly can't see it even if it's in front of her, she is straight in denial about anything that involves feelings and you," Nina is angry at her best friend and I simply laughed.

"You planned this? What a fucking disaster. That wasn't a good idea," I let them know as I took another sip of my drink, but my smile was wiped away quickly when I saw Melanie a few meters away.

"What the fuck?" That's all Lance says as I see the person beside her. Logan Sargeant. This isn't a coincidence. I wish it was.

"No." Nina is shocked as she watches the same scene I do.

"That doesn't surprise me," I comment as I look away but her voice is heard through the strangely low music, this part of the club is not as loud as the dancefloor.

"Can you take me back to the hotel when we leave? Or should I call a cab?" She asks him as she tries to talk over the music.

"I will take you back; I'm not planning on drinking much; I'm just hanging around," he comments as he leans down to her ear so she can hear him better.

"You should drink! You are an F1 driver now!" She says excitedly. She was fine; nothing had happened in her world. I was the only one who was left to recover the havoc she had left behind.

I was better without her, without all the chaos she brought. I liked sleeping alone. I didn't expect a message or a call from her. I didn't know how to take decent pictures, and I used way too much gel on my hair.

Now I will have shitty sleepless nights while she has fun with the new boy toy. He is newer than her; that must be fun. This was the plan all along; she never cut contact with him.

"I need to go, I can't do this, not this early. I will be fine once the new season starts, but this just ended two days ago, so I can't just pretend. You had good intentions; I'm sorry it didn't work," I tell them as I prepare to leave the club.

"Don't do that," I hear Alex's voice, and I turn to him.

"What?"

"She will see you leave. You can't give her a weak side. Just come with us and pretend. She is too blinded right now to see anything. She is in flight mode."

So I stayed. And I watched as she left the party with Logan an hour and something later, his arm carefully wrapped around her waist, that's way too much intimacy for two people who were just being friendly last weekend.

But that was the last time I saw her. The winter break started and I was with Alex a couple of times, even with Lily, and we never mentioned her. The subject was carefully avoided.

I tried moving on. I fell in love, but it wasn't reciprocated; it was a game for her. And that's on me. I should've known better. She would've never admitted to anything.

I think she truly believes she isn't worthy of love and that she isn't capable of loving. But that is no longer my problem.

So, I went home and avoided anything that reminded me of her. I stayed at my parents' house instead of staying at the apartment where we had spent so much time. I ignored every post or story she posted; I even ignored Logan's to make sure I wasn't trying to link them together, even Alex's stories I would ignore most of the time.

"What happened?" Benjy asked as we were relaxing in the living room. This Christmas had been nothing like I had imagined the last few months.

"Nothing, just wasn't meant to be," I try to sound nonchalant anda my sister sits on my right side, are they trying to make me feel pressured?

"You seem destroyed. The mask isn't working; it's failing miserably. You can vent. We are here for you," Cara mentions, clearly worried.

"Because I loved her. I love her. And she doesn't feel it back, or she won't admit to it, I don't know. I don't even know what she feels; she is like a master hiding it, and I just got myself into something I had no business being in. I was better ignoring whatever I felt instead of falling head first for someone who is clearly afraid of whatever love means," I finally concede and I let my feelings out, my sister immediately hugs me and I hug her back.

"She loves you. But you can't wait for her to know that, you need to move on with your life. Maybe it wasn't meant to be, maybe it's a life lesson but you deserve everything, you don't deserve to be treated like some shameful secret," she advices me and I nod.

"I'm moving on; I just need the space and time to think, to feel my emotions, and I will be fine once February comes and the season starts. I fucked myself over, I knew her and I knew this would have no happy ending on my part."

"Just be careful because love is not that easy to move on from, and she might come back sooner than February, and you need to know if you would accept that. What would you accept to have her back?" Benjy asks, and I think about it for one second.

"I would. I would accept anything at this point, and I don't like that," I confess, and he chuckles.

"You've got it good, G."

"She will be back before you know it, but make sure the words are said. She can't keep running from the truth; you are not an abusive ex, you were good for her, and she needs to apologize for running away, or she might do it every time it gets serious." Cara says sternly, and I nod.

"I don't know if I believe she will even realize she is fucking herself over."

And I doubted she would swallow her pride. She would rather choke on it.