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Past
1963
"Bethany moved on Alex?"
"What happened? Who is she with now?"
"I heard she became popular and thought Alex was not good enough for her."
"She really broke his heart."
"But she had more options out there. Better people than him."
At first I thought it was just a rumour, but one day I saw Alex really crying in a stairwell. He must've seen Bethany with another boy and felt something stab his heart—like I did when I saw Bethany with Alex. The great news about grade eight is this whole popular breakup thing—the entire school knows about this. It's good news for me because I have a chance to get with him.
The bad news... is that Angela is now in grade nine and has started high school. Even though she won't be by my side in high school anymore, she promised we probably could still see each other on weekends.
I love Alex; I don't know how to tell him that. He's all I could think about. I don't know what Angela would want me to do. If she is by my side, then she could tell me what to do. So it's up to me to decide what I should do about it.
"Who would like to come up and solve yesterday's homework? Question three?" The teacher asked. Someone in the front row raised her hand, and the teacher motioned for her to come up.
"So to turn this into scientific..." and the student up there blabbed so quickly I couldn't understand what she was saying about. I can't process it. Math is boring.
I looked at my own homework for question three. I looked straight away at the answer and placed a check mark on the question. I ripped off a paper from my math notebook and started at it. I'm going to try doing this. Again.
Write a confession note to Alex. And be brave enough to pass it to him. Then I realized I don't literally need to write "I love you.".
I could just write something that implied it.
Hi-
Want to hang out together? We haven't talked since grade five. I'd like to.
I stared at the note. I erased everything, then started over.
Hi
It's me, Ashley. We haven't talked since fifth grade. I was thinking if we could meet up together after school to catch up. I'd like to have a better friendship. I have no friends.
Ok, that sort of is true, but I don't need to admit it. He won't even be my friend that way. I erased it and then started over.
Hi!
Need help with math homework? I'm quite smart at it, and I could help you sometime after school! Two together is better.
I never finished writing the last sentence because a girl was staring at me. I turned to her. "What?" I asked. Oops. This girl is Bethany. "What's that? Oh, it seems like a..." Bethany stopped to suck it in. "A note. Hey, Mr. Hills! Ashley is writing a note when she's supposed to be reviewing yesterday's homework."
"Oh, really?"
The teacher came so fast I didn't have the time to shove it under my notebook. Even when I thought the note was half decent, of course it has to be ruined. I turned to glare at Bethany. At least she hadn't him; it was a love note, or else I might faint.
