Random Short Stories

Inedible Cupcake [🐟]

{Mary Sue Type: Better-Than-You Sue}
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It was on a stormy and cold night, one where forbidden science was taking place. Lightning crackled overhead, and it was on that fateful night a she-cat named Mysticalcupcake was born.

She was alive. ALIVE! As she grew up, she sometimes thought to herself, "Why is everybody else so common-looking and ugly? Like, am I the only good looking gal around here?"

She was quite a dazzling sight to behold, with jewel-toned blue-green fur dotted in white like rain in a storm, and bright pink-tinted highlights covered in gold and silver stars dangled over her amazing neon green eyes.

Mysticalcupcake was the greatest deputy and medicine cat that her clan, MonsoonClan, had ever known. And at the age of four moons, she was also the youngest!

She had joined the esteemed leaders' circle straight out of her time with the clan leader Salmonstar, where she simultaneously managed four moons' worth of training at the top of the apprentices and stood out as the absolutely most physically perfect student.

MonsoonClan was truly lucky to have her. Almost all of the warriors said so! "She is true credit to the spirit of working operative!" Torrentclaw, a senior warrior, was often heard to remark proudly.

"No one can handle a feisty badger or fox like her! And she knows just all the best spots to go hunt where the sunshine makes her fur positively glow!" Another warrior, Floodstream, was known to say.

"She's not bad." The medicine cat Pondleap once remarked. He was immediately given a stern talking to by Salmonstar, after which he requested to change his comment to "We wouldn't be able to do all this without her!"

And, although it's not something she liked anyone to judge her by, she was also the prettiest she-cat in the whole entire clan! The other MonsoonClan she-cats knew it too.

"I could never be as pretty as Mysticalcupcake." Dandelionbud had been heard to lament. But Mysticalcupcake was such a good cat, they really couldn't hold it against her. They loved her!

Even the elder Balsamflower, a well known sour-puss, had said, through oddly clenched teeth, "We could never hold that against her. She's such a good warrior. We love her."

It was Mysticalcupcake who figured out how to keep those horrid foxes and badgers from killing off cats every time they were provoked! As she could speak fox and badger, a stern talking-to managed to turn into an unlikely alliance.

Mysticalcupcake had even figured out how to talk to birds of prey and twolegs, and had convinced them both not to attack any of the MonsoonClan warriors ever again, a feat which was celebrated by the entire clan.

But Mysticalcupcake did not lead a life free of worry, oh no! She had many, many, horrible problems! She would often cry about them to her many lovers. "It is so awful!" She cried, her head resting gently against Coveberry's chest.

"What is?" The normally stoic sandy tom would have frowned, but he could never frown around the delightful Mysticalcupcake. No matter how much he might have wanted to.

"My horrible, awful secret! If you knew it, you would not love me anymore!" And she cried against his manly chest.

"Oh." Coveberry muttered. It took a few more minutes of her telling him about how he would not love her, and how horrible her secret was, before he finally had to, really had to, ask her "What secret?"

"Oh! My love! It is terrible!" And she threw herself from the plush moss nest, weeping dramatically. Another hour or so of such passed, before she finally deigned to tell him the secret.