Ellsworld (Genderbend Insert)

Moving Targets

The scene begins in the living room as Matt and Tord are watching TV boredly while Ell counts coins and Tamara looks at a vacation brochure.

Tamara: "So, where can we go on holiday this year?"

Ell: "I don't think we'll be able to afford anything... Good, this year."

Tamara: "Well, how are we gonna make quick cash then?"

Suddenly, everyone's interest moves to the TV as an ad for the army plays.

TV: "Want cash? Need a holiday? Then join the army! Filled with fun activities, friendly faces, 5-star accommodation, fantastic food and drink, and best of all, it's all FREE! So, hurry down to your local recruitment center and sign up today! *fast* Warning: Most of the preceding statement was false or just for entertainment purposes."

After the ad, everyone smiles as they get an idea.

Ell: "LET'S JOIN THE ARMY!"

The next scene is the gang on a map, using their heads to represent their locations as they find the recruitment center. Everyone splits up and goes to different spots on the map until they all reunite and find the recruitment center. After that, it cuts to Ell signing the paper to join the army. Everyone smiles behind her.

Ell: "There's no way we're gonna regret doing this, not even in a million years!"

The screen turns to black as white text comes up that says "Substantially less than a million years later". This line is narrated. After the black screen, the scene cuts to Ell, Matt. and Tord in army outfits. Unlike Ell and Matt's helmets, Tord has a pickelhaube. Tord is also the only one smiling.

Ell: "Oh, bum baskets..."

Sgt. Hilarson walks over to them.

Sgt. Hilarson: "I AM SGT. HILARSON, YOUR SENIOR DRILL INSTRUCTOR. FROM NOW ON, YOU WILL SPEAK ONLY WHEN SPOKEN TO, AND THE FIRST AND LAST WORDS OUT OF YOUR UGLY, FILTHY, CRUSTED PIE HOLES WILL BE SIR! DO YOU WORTHLESS MAGGOTS UNDERSTAND?!"

Everyone: "Sir! Yes, Sir!"

Ell: "Sir! Can I call you Hillary? Sir!"

Sgt. Hilarson makes an angry expression before He punches Ell, causing her to launch far away.

Tamara: "Ell! Oi, the hell did you kick her for?! She just asked a question!"

Sgt. Hilarson: "WATCH WHO YOUR TALKING TO MISSY!"

Tamara: "I am, and all I'm seeing is a loud mouthed baldy who has no respect for anyone!"

Sgt. Hilarson: "GIRLIES LIKE YOU TWO SHOULDN'T EVEN BE IN THE ARMY! LOOK AT YOU AND THE GREEN ONE! *Ell walks up next to Tamara with a bruise on her eye* YOU BOTH LOOK LIKE CHILDISH MORONS WHO COULDN'T LAST A DAY HERE! YOU BOTH SHOULD JUST GO BACK HOME AND DO WHAT NORMAL GIRLS SHOULD DO!!"

Tamara: "*growls* How about this then? If we manage to survive here for a long time and do good on a mission, you have to apologize to us and the women you insulted!"

Sgt. Hilarson: "*leans close to her face* Then you better be ready, because I will not be soft on you both, even if your girls."

He then walks away while Tamara glares as Ell stared at her in shock.

Ell: "Tam are you nuts?! That looks twice our sizes! I mean, the height compared to Matt's is not much different but still!"

Matt: "Wait what's that supposed to mean?"

Tamara: "Oh will you relax? We'll survive. Plus, I'm not letting my pride as a woman go down so easy."

Ell: "*sighs* Alright, let's do this then."