The FuBu

Chapter 15: The Unspoken Truth

Yanna sank into the plush cushions of Sarah's living room, her heart racing. The weight of her emotions felt heavier now that she had to put them into words. Sarah sat across from her, a mixture of concern and encouragement etched on her face.

"I think I've made a mistake, Sarah," Yanna confessed, her voice trembling. "I agreed to this whole 'friends with benefits' thing, but now... I think I'm in love with him."

Sarah raised an eyebrow, leaning in closer. "In love? Like, really in love? Yanna, that changes everything."

Yanna sighed, running her fingers through her hair in frustration. "I know! I thought I could handle it, that it would be simple. But every time I see him with Rikka, it feels like my heart is being ripped out. I don't want to feel this way!"

"Then you have to tell him how you feel," Sarah urged, her tone firm but compassionate. "You can't keep pretending everything's okay. It's not fair to either of you."

"But what if it ruins everything?" Yanna replied, panic flooding her voice. "What if he doesn't feel the same way? What if I end up losing him altogether?"

Sarah paused, contemplating Yanna's fears. "You're already losing him, Yanna. Look at how you're acting around him and Rikka. It's tearing you apart, and he probably senses that something's off."

Yanna nodded slowly, her heart aching at the truth of Sarah's words. "You're right. I can't keep lying to myself. But what if he brushes me off? What if he decides he wants to be with Rikka instead?"

"Then you'll know," Sarah said gently. "You deserve to know the truth. Keeping your feelings hidden is only going to hurt you more in the long run."

Yanna bit her lip, contemplating Sarah's advice. "I don't want to lose him," she whispered, her voice barely above a breath. "But I can't keep pretending I'm okay with everything either."

"Then take a leap of faith," Sarah encouraged, her eyes filled with determination. "You'll never know what could happen unless you take that step. You might be surprised by his reaction."

Taking a deep breath, Yanna felt a flicker of courage within her. "You really think I should?"

"Absolutely," Sarah replied, her voice steady. "You've got this, Yanna. Trust yourself and your feelings. Love isn't something to be afraid of. It's what makes life worth living."

Yanna's heart swelled with gratitude for her friend's unwavering support. "Thank you, Sarah. I just hope I don't make a fool of myself."

"You won't," Sarah assured her with a smile. "And even if it feels scary, remember that I'm here for you no matter what happens."

As Yanna sat back, reflecting on Sarah's words, she realized that the thought of confessing her feelings wasn't as terrifying as the idea of continuing to hide them. It was time to face the truth, no matter the outcome.

"Okay," Yanna finally said, determination creeping into her voice. "I'll talk to him. I'll tell him how I feel."

"That's the spirit!" Sarah beamed, her enthusiasm infectious. "You've got this. Just be honest, and no matter what, I'll be right here cheering you on."

With renewed resolve, Yanna stood up, feeling the weight of her confusion begin to lift, replaced by a sense of clarity. She knew she had to confront her feelings and take the risk. After all, love was worth fighting for, even if it meant stepping out of her comfort zone.

But as she walked out of Sarah's house, doubt crept back in. What if Fox didn't feel the same way? What if her confession only pushed him further away? Her heart raced at the thought of his laughter, the way he effortlessly filled the room with his energy. How could she possibly tell him that what they had wasn't enough anymore?

She recalled the playful banter they shared, the moments when his smile made her heart flutter. She cherished their friendship, but lately, it felt like it had shifted into something deeper, something that both excited and terrified her. The idea of losing that connection was unbearable.

Yanna sighed, her thoughts swirling like a storm inside her head. She had always been the one to keep her emotions in check, to play it cool, but now, everything felt different. Her heart raced at the possibility of revealing her feelings, but the fear of rejection loomed larger.

As she made her way home, she pondered over her unspoken truth. The conversations with Sarah echoed in her mind, urging her to take a leap of faith. She wanted to tell Fox everything, to lay her heart bare before him. But what if he didn't want that? What if their arrangement meant more to him than she realized?

She paused on the sidewalk, staring at the ground, lost in contemplation. It was a familiar spot where they had laughed and joked countless times. Memories flooded back—each moment a reminder of their bond and the playful warmth they shared. But beneath the laughter lay a growing tension that she could no longer ignore.

Yanna felt like she was teetering on the edge of a cliff, ready to jump but terrified of the fall. She knew she needed to make a choice: to confront her feelings or to let them fester in silence.

But for now, everything remained unspoken truth, a truth hovering just out of reach.

The whole night, Yanna kept silent, her mind racing with a whirlwind of thoughts. The glow from her phone illuminated the darkened room, each notification a reminder of Fox's attempts to reach her. But she couldn't bring herself to respond. Ignoring his calls felt like the only way to shield herself from the emotional chaos swirling within her.

She tossed and turned in bed, the weight of her unspoken feelings pressing down on her. Each ring of her phone sent a pang of guilt through her, but she couldn't face him—not yet. What would she say? How could she possibly explain the turmoil inside her without risking everything they had built together?

As the hours passed, Yanna replayed the day's events in her mind. Fox's laughter, the way he lit up when he was with Rikka, and the painful twist in her stomach that followed each shared moment. It was a struggle between wanting to protect her heart and the undeniable urge to scream her feelings from the rooftops.

She closed her eyes, wishing for clarity. Would it really be so bad to admit that she wanted more?

But fear gripped her tightly, refusing to let go. What if Fox saw her differently? What if he didn't want anything serious? The thought made her stomach churn.

After what felt like an eternity, Yanna finally picked up her phone, staring at the screen filled with missed calls from Fox. Each one felt like a reminder of her silence—a silence that echoed louder than any words she could muster. She hesitated, her finger hovering over the screen, battling with her instincts.

Should she call him back?

But what would she say? "Hey, sorry for ignoring you. I think I'm falling for you, and it terrifies me." It sounded absurd, childish even.

Yanna tossed her phone onto the bed, the impulse to connect battling against her fear of vulnerability. Maybe it was better this way. Better to keep things light, to not complicate their friendship any further.

The night dragged on, filled with silence and uncertainty. In her heart, Yanna knew she was at a crossroads, but she chose to remain in her cocoon of denial, hoping that by avoiding the truth, she could somehow hold on to what little clarity she had left.

As sleep finally claimed her, she dreamed of Fox, his smile brightening even her darkest moments. But in her dreams, she found no solace, only the same unanswered questions that haunted her waking hours.