Who the hell am I (english version)

How to change a life

Sleepily, I toss and turn in my bed, blindly reaching for my phone to silence the awful alarm blaring in my ears, threatening to shatter my eardrums. After several failed attempts to grab it, I finally open my eyes, turn it off, and glance at the time: "5:50," the screen reads.

"Oh man," I whisper to myself, rolling onto my back. I rub my face with both hands and then stretch. I look out the windows. The sky is a symphony of blue, purple, pink, and yellow, with the sun slowly rising on the horizon. I must have been so exhausted after training yesterday that I forgot to close the blinds and even left my window open. I slowly sit up, continuing to gaze out the window, savoring the brief moment of complete silence. In the distance, I spot Rock Creek Park, where I had my last open-air shelter just a year ago. I shake my head slightly at the thought of how long it's been.

I take a few deep breaths and relax for a moment. That's something that came with joining S.H.I.E.L.D.: even as a secret agent, I find more relaxing moments than I ever did while wandering. I'm almost on the verge of dozing off again when there's a knock on my door. An exasperated groan escapes me; I'm not ready to get up yet, but Nat probably won't give me a choice.

"Are you still sleeping, Elora?" I hear her call from outside. Believe me, I would love to be. A smile creeps across my face as I think back to the day a year ago when everything changed. I never would have believed I'd have a friend like Natasha, but life is never predictable. Everything can change in an instant.

Flashback

I was sitting by Rock Creek. It was still early in the morning, and the first rays of sunlight were filtering through the canopy of leaves. A cool summer morning, the birds chirping, and almost no one was out at this hour—except Natasha. She was out for a run that morning, taking the Western Ridge Trail, and she saw me as I made the water rise a little.

When I realized I was being watched, I braced myself for the horrified expression, for the fear that's always etched on people's faces when they catch even a glimpse of what I can do. But that's not what happened. When I turned to face her, she was simply smiling at me. She had shoulder-length, straight red hair, a little darker than mine, and was wearing a black sports set of leggings and a top. I didn't understand it. Why didn't the blood drain from her face? Why didn't she recoil when I looked directly into her eyes? Why was she smiling at me? After a few minutes, she broke the silence that was beginning to suffocate me.

"That was really impressive." Those were her first words. The shock of her statement must have been written all over my face. I don't remember if I said anything at all, if my mouth just hung open, or if I simply stared at her like a stray puppy, longing for the smallest bit of attention.
"You're Elora Sue, right?" she asked me. How does she know my name? I pressed my fingernails into my palms until they left marks—a very bad habit, but something I always did when I was nervous. What does she want from me? She was about to ask again when I managed to stammer a quick "Yes." That was all I could muster. It had been so long since I last spoke to anyone. My last real conversation was probably with the doctor at the hospital where I woke up two years ago, before I ran away.

"You can control the elements." I don't know if it was a question or a statement, but I responded with a simple nod. She knew my name and what I was capable of—not creepy at all. The ground beneath my feet felt like it was being pulled out from under me. I was prepared for her to reject me like everyone else, to hurl words at me that grew more creative from person to person. Labels meant to define me. I lowered my gaze, not wanting to meet her eyes anymore.
"My name is Natasha Romanoff," she said to me. I still didn't want to look up. It was all too much for me. I didn't want to know anyone's name, didn't want to remember people. As if reading my thoughts, she continued, "Don't worry, I'm not judging you for your gift." A gift? It's a damn curse! "People don't understand you. They're afraid of you because you're different from them and capable of things no one should be capable of." Thanks for the slap in the face. My chest tightened. I just wanted to be alone. "Reports from various witnesses have finally given us a solid lead to find you after two years. You don't have to be out here alone anymore, Elora," she continued.