WANTING LANA

TWENTY SIX

Atlas

What did she just say?

"Are you not going to answer me mum? You sent Lana away?" I asked, throwing a glare at her from the bed I laid in.

Initially, I thought the voices I heard were in my dreams but when my eyes opened to see the two people talking before me, what I thought was a bad dream turned to reality.

Her shoulders dropped as she looked at me with guilt written all over her.

"I am sorry Atlas, it really isn't what you think,"she said with a slight whimper to her voice.

Not what I think?

I wanted explanations and all she could tell me was that she was sorry?

That took my emotions way beyond anger and the next thing I saw myself doing was taking out the intravenous needles from my hand as I stood up from the bed.

Both hers and Cameron's eyes focus on me in panic at what I had just done.

"I really don't think you should be doing that Atlas" Cameron tried warning but I ignored him and faced the woman I called mother.

"All you have to say to me is sorry? She is gone mother, fucking gone! And you stand here to tell me sorry. How could you do this to me mum? I told you I wanted to marry her and the next thing you could do is chase her away? What kind of mother are you?" I screamed in her face.

"A mother that loves you Atlas! Your therapist called me and told me you stopped. He said he suspected you did so because of her. You haven't been taking his calls and he was pushed to call me instead. Imagine my surprise when I found after that you have been pinning over her way before you ever told us. I know about how you met her Atlas and it wasn't from some interview. I was scared that things could go out of hand and so was your therapist. He said if you kept going without your therapy, your condition could worsen. What was I to do? As long as you had her with you, you wouldn't have listened. I had to make her leave for a short while at least until you got better Atlas, that's all." She explained, her eyes begging me to understand but all her words did was weaken me.

It couldn't be that she told her everything right? I thought with a sinking feeling in my stomach.

"So what did you do? Did you tell her everything?" I asked her anxiously, hoping to God that she didn't.

However, when she didn't say anything in response I knew, I knew she did just that.

"How could you?" I screamed at her.

It must have taken her unawares because she jumped in fright.

"I think you should calm down Atlas, everyone should calm down" Cameron tried to input again but I wasn't having it.

"Don't tell me to calm down" I told him, throwing a glare at him before turning back to face my mother.

"What kind of a mother are you to even do that? Who gave you the right to tell her about everything? I was going to tell her everything when the time was right and now you have ruined everything! Have you ever wonder why we never seemed to get close no matter how much we tried?" I asked her in disdain.

She looked at me with sad eyes as her lips trembled close to tears but I couldn't just find it in me to care.

"You never asked or listened, you always just assumed what you thought was best. I hated it, because to me what you think is best is not what is. As my mother, weren't you supposed to try talking it out with me rather than destroying my relationship? If you had asked, if you had even tried to reach out to me first, you would have known that I had plans to return back to therapy. I knew I needed to if I wanted to be deserving of her but now, you have snatched that chance away from me." Maybe the scorn in my eyes as I spoke those words to her got to her because the dam broke and she sobbed.