I don't want to get better.
It's all I've known, let me feel comforted by being ill.
I keep asking myself, is it ill to think this way.
But if it were ill enough I would be hospitalised, or even better dead.
My life is absolutely worthless, I've lost all my love of my hobbies, and given up trying for anything be it fun or academics. I'm empty not filled with passions or ideas. Just empty and worthless. Hook me up to a machine to make me feel something, to have energy to do things to even try. I can't even suck up energy to do the simplest of things like hygiene and replying others. I feel disgusting and I sink into the bed for hours on end each passing day. I wallow in my self pity. Oh dear god, just let me live again. To be alive is to feel and god, I feel nothing.
YOU ARE READING
An Abomination
PoetryReal life diary entities of a crazed bpd teenage girl, going through the tough works of life. Hope my writing can let people know that at they're not alone.
