Run Away ✧ Hogwarts Legacy

chapter forty-six

G.I.N.A.S.F.S. ("Gay Is Not a Synonym for Shitty") by Fall Out Boy 

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The cottage had a sense of peace that settled in. Antheia lay crunched up under his arm desperate to savor the calmness of the moment for as long as possible. She wasn't sure how much time had been wasted between them, but she didn't care. Her finger traced over the ghostly white scars that coated Sebastian Sallow's chest. Despite his claim that it wasn't her fault, deep down in her heart she would always feel the weight of her discussion in sending him to Azkaban that she was responsible for at least one of them.

It was quiet in their aftermath. Neither had spoken for some time as if they weren't sure what had happened was real.

Sebastian pressed a soft kiss against the top of her head. His hand brushed the hair from hiding her face. "I'm sorry," He persisted.

A small smile of satisfaction cracked across Antheia's face. "I think you apologized enough," She teased, then added, "At least for today."

Antheia's consistent tracing over his skin came to an end as he freed himself from the bed to stand. She didn't follow and instead stretched out in the newly opened space as she watched him seek out a fresh set of clothes.

"You don't even know what I'm apologizing for this time," Sebastian smirked as he dressed. "Actually, it's a bit rude of you to assume."

"Shall I run through the list again for you?" Antheia mocked.

He scoffed at the joke. His pants were already back on as he opened a drawer and fished out another shirt that already looked too big in his hands. It seemed like he was in a rush to be covered again which reminded Antheia of her first time. The lack of confidence and heightened sense of self-awareness would leave you feeling exposed in a new way. 

Time had put them on different paths in life. Antheia never had these doubts about herself anymore. She had felt as comfortable in her own skin laying on the bed in front of him as she did fully dressed. But, she wondered just how exposed Sebastian had felt from it all.

Once the shirt was loose and open over his arms, those grassy green eyes turned and found hers once again. Then he told her, "I was going to tell you that I'm sorry for not kissing you sooner."

Antheia smiled back at him. There wasn't a sense of regret that she had from not being with him sooner, only for the fear of moving forward.

Her eyes lingered over the scars as she watched him work button to button up his chest. Finally, she asked, "Did they hurt?"

Sebastian's smile seemed to sink away a bit at the question. He kept working the button, now with a bit more speed as if he felt more exposed by the question than the experience.

"It wasn't that bad," He claimed, but she was sure it was a lie. As if he was attempting to comfort her by not peeling back the curtain of the years he'd spent as a prisoner.

Antheia attempted to push for more, "What hap-"

"I don't want to talk about it," Sebastian cut her off, "It's not that I don't want to tell you, but I'm not ready to." It was half of the truth. Sebastian didn't want to acknowledge that he was still a prisoner to her, not after finally being with her. He didn't want to paint that image in her head for her to dull on when this was over with and he was sent back for his crime.