"My Flower"

Chapter 15 - Tears and Cigarettes

~ ~ ~ 1996

Her darkened blue eyes fluttered open, exhaustion trying to pull them close once more but the sharp beeping noise that went off every so often was too annoying to ignore any longer.

Blossom took a look around the room she was in and it took her unusually long to realize it wasn't hers. The room was painted a bright white with only one blue striped running sideways half up the wall and stretching out the door.

The furniture was mostly non existent, just 2 simple chairs, a small sink, an even smaller box tv, and a screen like poster that had illuminated photos of somebody's skull displayed.

She knew this was a hospital room but couldn't think of how or why she was there, gazing down at the tubes shoved up into her arms and chests frightened her to her core.

That annoying beeping picked up its speed.

Beep.

Where are the nurses?

Beep.

Where are my parents?

Beep. Beep.

How'd I get here?

Beep. Beep.

Am I dead?

Beep. Beep. Beep.

A new sound filled her ears, the sound of a push door hitting its respective door stopper and slowly slinging back to its original position.

Finally, a face she recognized.

Blossom tried to speak but couldn't force any words out. At first she didn't make any sound, like her voice had been stolen from her while she was unconscious but Blossoms persistence prevailed enough to let out a mumbled sort of scream.

Eli Anderson whipped his head around in fright and seeing her staring back didn't calm him back down.

"Shit." Eli mumbles, smoke escaped from his parted lips with the word and he removed the stick like object from his mouth in an instant.

He ran over to the small sink and twisted the cold water valve. Eli hesitated, looking from the stick in his fingers over to Blossom.

Eli took one last inhale and promptly coated the stick in water with a smokey sigh.

"Sorry, er thought you'd still be asleep. I know, I know It's not right I do this in a hospital room but my grandma won't let me step outside. It's like she knows what I'm doing before I even do." Eli replied, fidgeting with his neck, his hair, his fingers going from one to the other and back again in a matter of minutes.

"Just don't say anything ok? Who am I kidding you're so drugged up you won't even remember this in a couple hours." He continued on as his eyes met with Blossom's worried filled ones. "...I'm going to go get everyone else, they'll want to see you."

Blossom let out another one of her jumbled attempts at words which luckily stopped Eli dead in his tracks.

"Are you alright..of course you aren't, shit but like are you in pain? Need more meds?" He inched slightly closer with the end of his sentence.

She found the strength in her to shake her head no but instantly regretted it after the wave of pain hit her like a truck.

Not only was she hit with physical pain but the previous nights painful and traumatic memories flashed through her brain.

She was here with a painful head injury and an unusable voice because 2 men almost raped her not even 48 hours ago. The thought alone was too much to bear.

Blossom burst into tears that stung her eyes and felt like boiling water flowing down her cheeks. The water seeping into the soft tissue of the gauze attached to her reddening face.

"Hey no, don't cry. They'll bring you more medicine soon ok?" Eli walks closer to her only to press the red help button attached to the hospital bed 3 to 4 times.

That didn't help Blossom stop crying and Eli was running out of things he knew how to do.

He makes a decision that looked in the heat of the moment but was no doubt thought through extensively before he acted.

Eli plops himself into a chair nearby her hospital bed and places a trembling hand on the plush mattress in a way that was intended to be comforting.

The sudden reach, even if it wasn't directed towards her made Blossom flinch and the Anderson boy let out a small sigh.

"..I know what that's like." Eli said in a voice so low it was almost not said at all. His eyes fall to floor, then to his hands which nervously picked at the unhealed scratch across his hand until it bled.

Eli licks off the beads of blood before yanking out a small box that read CIGARETTES and pulling one of those sticks out.

"Yes, I did just put the last out but the was a stupid mistake. My nerves are shot right now, I just..have to calm down. I never should have come." Eli hissed as the end of the cigarette was shoved in between his dry lips

"I mean-like I'm not saying I wish I wasn't here to see you because that's not it. I can't stand hospitals. You know that." His voice was almost mumbled due to the item lodged in his mouth. He was now frantically patting his pockets, searching for something until it was found and yanked out aggressively.

A black lighter sparked after one good roll shooting out a small flame and setting the end of the cigarette alight.

Eli's body relaxed into the nicotine, breathing in deeply with every breath, head falling further back the more smoke poured out into the room.

Since when did Eli smoke? This was news to her. Blossom had become so invested in watching him she hadn't even realized the tears had stopped and were replaced by soft hicks and red eyes.

By the way he was ingesting it, it couldn't have been that recent. He looked addicted already and the thought unsettled her immensely.

"Ok..any ways. I'm not sure when they should be here with the stuff but you seem like you want some company?" He asked, forgetting she was unable to respond but took her slow blink as a yes. "They got the asses that did it. With their DNA all over you and Evan's witness statement they are cooked for sure. You probably won't even have to testify at their court date."

"But you never know, our system is fucked beyond fixing so there's no telling. It's best to avoid it if you can. Some people say you get closure from being able to look the person in the eye and put em away but that's B.S." Eli ranted, taking a drag every other sentence.

"Only makes it harder to move on. Just look at me and Chance, total poster boys for healed trauma right?" Sarcasm coated his voice and the smile plastered on his face wasn't genuine but it made Blossom laugh faintly nonetheless.

Eli bites his bottom lip, letting his eyes wander around the room before he spoke again. "It's gonna suck, that's the truth. And no one else is going to tell you this but just ride it out honestly. Feel everything because if you pretend it isn't there the hurt only gets worse until you are so far gone it's all you know. Once you do that you have to move on, allow yourself to move on. That's the only way you can heal. To make it suck less. It gets better."

Blossom was crying again and Eli grimaced "Too far? Fuck I shouldn't have started talking about this so soon-" he was interrupted half way through by actual words

"No. Thank you..Eli."

Eli smiled softly at her as Blossom held out her hand for him to take. In return Eli took only one of her fingers in his grasp and gave it a quick squeeze of reassurance. "Now where are those nurses? Is this stupid button broken? I'm gonna go grab them and you parents before you pass out again ok?"

Blossom gave Eli a small smile and didn't protest as he swiftly extinguished his bud and left the room.

Although she was alone in the quiet unfamiliar hospital room, Blossom truly didn't feel so alone anymore.