Echoes of Forgotten

Uppat-a-pulo

Jennie sat in the plush chair across from her therapist, Dr. Kang. Jennie and Lisa decided to Jennie's therapy before them going to the company, their 3 days off had been come to an end.

 Jennie feeling nervous and exposed. It was her first therapy session, and although she knew it was necessary, she was terrified of confronting the whirlwind of emotions she had buried deep inside. Lisa had suggested therapy, and Jennie agreed—she would do anything to fix herself for Lisa.

Dr. Kang smiled warmly at her, offering a sense of calm. "Jennie, I'm glad you're here today. I know this is difficult, but it's a step toward healing. Why don't we start with how you're feeling about the relationship right now?"

Jennie stared at her hands, picking at the corner of her sleeve. "I... I'm the one who ruined everything," she whispered, her voice shaking. "It's my fault. All of it. I made a choice—cheating on Lisa, hurting her in the worst way. And now... I can't stop thinking about how much pain I've caused."

Tears welled up in her eyes, but she forced herself to continue. "I was selfish. I wanted things I shouldn't have. I gave in to my desires, and I lost the only good thing I had. Lisa was perfect. She's... she's the best person I've ever known, and I destroyed her."

Dr. Kang leaned forward gently. "Jennie, I can see you're in a lot of pain. It's important to recognize that you made a mistake, but that doesn't define who you are as a person."

Jennie shook her head, the tears now falling freely down her cheeks. "No, you don't understand. I am a bad person. I'm the villain in this story. Lisa didn't deserve any of what I did to her. She was so good to me, and I threw it all away. I don't know how to forgive myself."

Her words came out in choked sobs, and she buried her face in her hands. The weight of her guilt was suffocating her.

Dr. Kang handed her a tissue, her voice steady but empathetic. "Jennie, cheating was your poorest choice in life, and yes, it caused immense pain. But that doesn't make you inherently bad. People make poor choices all the time, often out of confusion, fear, or emotional needs they don't fully understand. What we need to explore is why you made that choice. You're not beyond redemption. You have the capacity to heal and to make amends, both to Lisa and to yourself."

Jennie sniffled, wiping her face. "But how can I ever make up for what I've done? Lisa... she's so strong, but I've seen what I did to her. She lost herself because of me. I don't know if I can ever forgive myself for breaking her like that."

Dr. Kang nodded thoughtfully. "Healing and forgiveness, especially self-forgiveness, take time. You're holding yourself to an impossibly high standard right now. You're punishing yourself more than anyone else is, and that's keeping you stuck in this cycle of guilt."

Jennie bit her lip, trying to control the flood of emotions. "But she's still so good to me. She's helping me now, and it just makes me feel worse. I don't deserve her kindness after everything."

Dr. Kang gave her a soft smile. "You've hurt her, but she clearly sees something in you worth healing. Jennie, people are not defined by their worst moments. You need to give yourself the chance to heal and grow from this. Therapy will help with that, but only if you're willing to open up and be honest with yourself about your feelings."

Jennie nodded slowly but remained quiet, not ready to fully admit how deep her love for Lisa still ran. She was afraid—afraid of hoping, of wanting something that she no longer felt she had the right to want.

The therapist continued gently, "Right now, you're still processing a lot of guilt. It's good that you're owning up to your mistakes, but part of healing is also understanding that you can't change the past. What we can work on is the present—learning to forgive yourself, taking responsibility in a healthy way, and figuring out how to move forward."