Part 53

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Ling

After leaving the company, I ask Mr. Somchai to take me home immediately since honestly, I miss Orm already. Besides, I need to make sure that she's okay after what happened to her last night, which I still have no idea about.

As soon as we arrive in front of my house, and Mr. Somchai drives away, I rush towards the door seeing Orm's unconscious body carried by the man I dislike. "What's wrong?" I ask, doing my best to contain both anger and worry.

Kwang grabs my arm from behind, and I haven't noticed that she is here in the first place. "She passed out when she was about to leave. She's pale and weak since I saw her, but she said she's okay. Ling, I am sorry-"

"No, it's not your fault," I answer, taking Orm in my arms without really paying attention to the former man who carried her as I walk inside my house, and Kwang follows behind. Kwang explains some more conditions of Orm and leaves along with her brother after asking me to tell her when Orm is awake.

I lock the gate before running back to look at Jennie who is lying on our bed. She's so pale now, and I wonder why I didn't notice anything that might be wrong with her when I left for work.

This morning she looked all right because if she was even a bit off, I would have known, and I am sure that I wouldn't let her step away from our place, let alone to work.

Brushing her hair away from her soft cheek and beautiful face, I observe her figure more carefully. She indeed is not well. I know she is sick, but what I can hope right now is that she is just physically ill. Dear God, don't add more burden to this pure creature anymore.

Grabbing her hand, I take it up to my face. It might sound like a child or whatever, but I need to feel her skin against mine because right now I am really scared, and I don't know what to do anymore.

Suddenly, her fingers shake in my hand, making me realize that she is already awake.

"Orm." I lean down to pick on her lips immediately. It sounds and seems crazy to do that the first thing she wakes up, but that's my coping mechanism. I am anxious, and god only knows how suffocating I am to face the predicaments, where my wife had to be unconscious twice in front of me.

She smiles, trying to touch my cheek with the other hand. Unfortunately, she doesn't have enough energy to do that so I help her to feel my skin. Maybe, that's all we need after all. "You made me scared," I mumble softly after kissing her palm. "Should we go to the hospital now or should I bring you there to check up on your health?" I am about to carry her when she shakes her head instantly.

I understand that I can bring her if I want since she has no strength at all, but this girl can be stubborn sometimes, so I have no gut to challenge her when she is this weak. Perhaps, we will call a doctor to come here, or we will go when I can persuade her.

"I am okay. I am just exhausted,"

I frown, thinking about what the cause is. "Is it because of last night?" Her cheeks redden when she knows what I am talking about. "No. It's not your fault since I was the one who wanted it, right?" She jokes."Orm, how about the nightmares that bothered you?" It's so understandable that she wants some time, but if it continues to happen, her health sooner or later will be affected both physically and mentally.

Of course, I will be the one to blame if that is going to happen. "Orm, tell me. I need you to trust me, okay? I won't judge you or anything. I just want to listen and get some burden off of your chest." Her eyes gleam with tears as I take off my jacket hurriedly before slipping beside her on the bed, covering ourselves with the thick white sheets. "Shh, you don't need to if it still severely triggers you. I understand." I am taken aback when she snuggles against my neck and tightens her grip on my waist as if she is afraid of something that has been haunting her for so long. I return her embrace, feeling her warmth and soft skin, and when I am about to give up and sleep, a soft scared voice with a tremble alerts me back. "I am afraid that one day you will leave me."

I frown, a little angry when she thinks that I am the kind of person who leaves her wife easily, but I can't burst into anger because she needs me right now, and the last thing I can do now is to continue to listen to her with empathy and understanding. So, I urge her to explain more, "May I know why?"

"I don't know. Before you return your love, I always think that my only goal is to make you fall for me, but when you already do, I am afraid that you will leave like ...like..." She starts to sob as I rub her back, soothing her. "It's okay. You don't have to"

She pulls back, looking at me. "No, I have already decided to tell you." I sigh, kissing her forehead, "But, if it is too much for you, or you need some time to settle down first, you can."

Shaking her head, she continues. "I need to get it off of my chest like you said." She swallows the lump in her throat before putting on a brave face and confesses." I don't want you to leave me like my..... dad."

Then, she starts to cry and cry on my shoulder, and I needn't any reason to ask more because I know how hard she has been through. Growing up without your parent is challenging and cruel. That explains why my dad is so soft with her, and my mom always asks me to look after her to the point where I think they love her more than me, which of course is okay.

The worst thing is the stupid old me didn't know anything about her nor tried to pay any attention to any of that.

Maybe, God will give me another chance now, and I swear to devote my life and my love to her as my wife from now on until the rest of our lives.

I love you, Orm Kornnaphat.

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