Everything Starts

CH: 14, LATE-NIGHT TALKS

We walked quietly until Zena spoke up.

"Did anyone else notice that Adrian had rosy cheeks the whole night?"

Her words snapped me out of my daze.

"What?"

"Adrian. He was blushing the entire night and Wesley looked like he could've fallen into a puddle of drool or killed someone at any moment."

"I noticed that too," Fay announced.

I looked down at my feet. "I don't want to hurt any of them."

"We know. Do you have any idea what you want?" Willa asked.

"Honestly... None at all because it was only months ago that I never wanted to see Wesley again but then I came to school and- and I was determined to not fall for him again. I just wanted to be friends but he- I don't know. And Adrian! Adrian is kind and smart, and I can feel how much he cares for me radiating off him. When we met and were talking in the closet, I noticed how close we were standing and I think he did too but neither of us moved. It was like we both wanted to be that close. I even found myself wanting to be closer. When I told him about Wesley and me, he was so understanding. When he's around I feel safe."

"You like him don't you?" Z asked.

"Yeah, I guess I do. That's why things are complicated. When Wesley and I were dancing in the rain and I kissed him I was almost ready to say yes let us get back together but that was before Adrian came along. I can see how hurt Wesley is when Adrian and I do something but I would be lying to you and myself if I said I didn't have feelings for them both. Wow, that was the first time I've said that out loud. I'm sorry. I'm rambling aren't I?"

"No! It's okay! We care about you and like to hear what you are thinking," Fay responded.

"Let's list the pros and cons of them both, how does that sound?" Zena asks.

"Classic Zena."

I laughed. "Yes but that sounds like a good idea and maybe, just maybe, it will help my brain think properly. We should start with Wesley's pros. He is smart, kind, and creative."

"Don't forget he also missed you so much while you were gone that he never dated or even kissed another girl since you left," Zena added.

"Yeah, and he would make excuses to bring you into the conversation, even after Z, Willa, and I told him he needed to try to move on."

"Okay. Now for the cons. Every time I see him I want to cry. In all honesty, I don't know if that belongs in the pros or cons because I don't know if they would be happy tears or not. When I picture doing something with him like kissing or dating, a picture pops into my head where I'm looking at the same situation but from outside my body and I have been replaced by Darcy."

"Alora I am so sorry, I knew you were still struggling but we had no idea that was happening."

"Yeah. Why didn't you tell us?"

"I guess I just never wanted to bring it up. I don't think I would be this bad if it hadn't been for what Darcy said to me the day before the beach party."

As I finished my sentence we could see the doors to Rosemore but when I turned to look behind me Zena, Willa, and Fay had all stopped.

"What?"

"We didn't know she said anything to you."

"Oh yeah. She came up to me after class and told me I didn't deserve Wesley and she would find a way to break us up." I started tearing up. "And then she said they had made out in a bathroom like two months after we had gotten together."