Leather, Love, and Lace*EDITING*

02. Home sweet home

A/N This is mildly triggering, for some it could be very triggering, please don't read of your going to be triggered. Or if you feel you might but need to read it anyways, kik me (cammie_krueger) to make sure your fine. I would prefer if you are going to be triggered you just skip. I'm here if you need me.
*Carson's P.O.V*
I woke up to arms pulling me out of the impala, I could tell it was Dean due to his soft leather jacket. He carried me like I weighed nothing. He knew I was awake but still didn't let my feet hit the floor until we got inside.
"I'm going to head to bed."
Dean gave me a long hard look.
"Are you sure your alright?"
"I'm fine just tired." I made my way up the stairs, it was good to be at Bobby's, it felt like home.
I found my bag in the room Dean usually stayed in, I began to undress. I looked into the mirror as I stoop there, black bralette(like a half tank top the back is three strings) and my black lace booty underwear. There was handprints on my sides and arms, bruises littered all over. there was raised scars on my thighs, I started to take of my braclets, I tore open a cut in the process, I stared at the mirror longer looking at the jagged red lines running up my arm, one leaving a blood trail down my wrist.
The more I looked in the mirror the worse it got. My makeup was off, my clothes were gone. It was just me, my hair was a mess, I was ugly, I was fat, I hated myself.
The door creaked open, I sucked in a breathe, my eyes widened as I saw Dean. I was paralyzed, I knew he saw the scars, and the cuts, I just couldn't move. He made his way over, boots echoing on the wood floor, his eyes never left me. I could see deep down in the hunter green, he was broke. There were tears welling up in his eyes. A single tear streaked his cheek. His hand laid gently on the print on my side, the other hand found the other hand print, but this was different then Kyles.
Deans were gentle and protective Kyles were rough and intended pain. Dean leaned in and placed his lips by my ear.
"Did he-did he make you- force you-"
I knew exactly what he was getting at, the nights he would rip of my clothes and wouldn't stop no matter how much I said no.
"Yea."
"Why didn't you call me Carson."
"I honestly didn't think you would answer Dean, okay I thought I screwed up with you like I did everyone else. I thought I pushed you away."
"Why didn't you leave him."
"I didn't want to be alone anymore."
Dean grabbed a hold of my wrists and turned the cuts up, forcefully but carefully. He kissed each one, he looked at me tears falling freely down my face.
*Deans P.O.V*
I looked at Carson's face as tears streamed down it, I dropped her wrists.
"This is my fault, this is all my fault" I mumbled to myself.
"No I just-it's been me- it's I just-"
She couldn't find the words, I could see her she was racking her brain for the right way to form the sentence. She was so pretty, and smart there was probably so many words she was racking through.
"Look, I only left you because, I know I suck with words and this is going to mess so much up, but because I am in love with you and I couldn't have you sit in the impala with me, or walk around half naked and have to know your not mine. I couldn't sit at the bar and watch guys hit on you and buy you drinks and not be able to run them off by kissing you, or telling them I won you, that you were my princess. The only reason I left in the first place is Sammy, I tried my best and my best wasn't good enough he's happier with out me."
"Dean?" I fucked up, I lost her for good.
*Carson's P.O.V*
"Yea?" His voice broke at the end, he stared his feet.
"I love you too." he looked up, green eyes lit up, this was the happiest I had ever seen Dean. He wrapped his arms around my and kissed my forehead. I leaned down onto his chest so he could rest his chin on my head.
"I fell in love with you the day I turned ten, and have been trying to show it sense your tenth birthday, I knew that day you hated yourself, that was also the day I vowed to keep you okay and alive. I wasn't good enough though huh?"
I didn't say anything, I had an extensive vocabulary yet no words to complete this situation, instead I tangled my hands into his hair and let him put his lips on mine. He picked me up like I was a kid and carried my to the bed, he laid me down and crawled over me, planting kisses along my collar bone. He ended with a kiss on my nose before pulling the covers over me.
"I'm here now, still here."
"Get some sleep." he walked and hit the light switch.
"Please don't leave..."
I felt the bed shift as he laid back down. "I promise baby girl, we're going to be alright, you know that right."
"I hope so Dean, I hope so."
*Dean's P.O.V*
That sentence was better then an I love you to me. We were going to be okay, she needed to hear it, I needed to believe it. I looked at Carson's head in my chest, hair splayed out on the pillows, falling in her face. She looked beautiful, moonlight falling on her face, highlighting her jaw line and eyelashes. I finally had her, that was all I needed. I had Carson and Sam, they we're both going to be okay. Carson wasn't leaving this world until it was her time, she was going to believe she was good enough. I promised this, I would fix it all.
I drifted off as The smell of her hair, coconut and vanilla filled my nose, and her breathing felt rythmous. It was calming and we were going to be okay.
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Please let me know what you guys thought of this and if you have any ideas or things you'd like to see in the story. I'm trying to get the exposition out of the way so it's a bit short and wordy. Hopefully it gets better soon, I will write 1D, teen wolf(not my best), and twd fanfics.
Tysm, and ily you all. Comments and votes greatly appreciated.