Nikolai had always been captivated by birds. Their elegant wings, the way they soared effortlessly through the sky-it was a kind of beauty that never ceased to amaze him.
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He often watched them from his window, imagining what i...
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CHAPTER TWENTY ONE
( y/n pov )
You sat back on the sofa, lazily munching on the snacks Nikolai had "acquired" for you, the flickering light of the television casting soft shadows across the dimly lit room. The room felt strangely empty without him, despite the usual chaotic energy he brought with him every time he was around. You glanced down at your phone, expecting to see a random text or a silly photo from him, but it was silent. No notifications, no messages. That was...unusual. He'd normally send you something bizarre to remind you that he was out there, thinking of you in his own odd way.
You sighed, sinking deeper into the cushions. A feeling of loneliness crept in, one you tried to push away with the noise of the TV, but it wasn't working. Even the show you had on felt dull in comparison to the way Nikolai could make anything, even the most mundane moments, feel alive. You took a deep breath, exhaling slowly as your wings slumped by your side. They felt heavier when he wasn't around.
It wasn't like you to sulk over him like this, but tonight, everything felt a little off. Maybe it was the way the room seemed colder without his presence, or maybe it was the fact that he hadn't even sent you a quick update on the mission. The silence weighed on you, making you wonder where he was, what he was up to. You trusted him, but there was always that sliver of doubt in your mind. Nikolai was unpredictable, after all. You never knew what kind of chaos he might stir up on a whim.
You shifted on the sofa, wrapping yourself tighter in the blanket. Your wings rustled against the fabric, but even the comforting warmth of the blanket wasn't enough to shake the strange feeling gnawing at you.
Maybe he was just busy. That's what you told yourself. Maybe things were more complicated than usual with the mission, and he didn't have time to send you one of his ridiculous texts. Still, that didn't stop your mind from wandering. What if something went wrong? What if he needed you, but you weren't there?
The thought made you frown, and you quickly pushed it aside. Nikolai was strong, capable of handling anything thrown his way. You knew that. He didn't need you worrying about him. And yet...you couldn't help it. He had a way of getting under your skin, making you care even when you didn't want to. That clown.
You took another bite of your snack, trying to distract yourself from the growing pit in your stomach. You tried to focus on the show playing in front of you, but your mind kept drifting back to him. It was strange how quiet everything felt without his constant chatter. You missed the sound of his voice, the way he'd playfully poke at you, always trying to get a rise out of you. You even missed the way he'd call you "dove" in that sing-song voice of his.
You glanced at your phone again, hoping—no, expecting—something. But the screen remained dark and silent. No Nikolai.
With a groan, you leaned back and tossed your phone onto the coffee table, staring up at the ceiling. Why was he on your mind so much tonight? You'd been through this before—him going off on missions, you waiting for him to return. It was the nature of your relationship. But something about tonight felt different. Maybe it was the fact that he hadn't sent you even one cryptic message or random picture. Or maybe it was because, deep down, you missed him more than you were willing to admit.
