Into the Sunshine: Of Love and Loss Series Book Two

25

A chaotic tangle of emotions consumed Everett, rendering him speechless for the first half of the journey to Pocatello. Only when Iris remarked, "It feels strange not to have the twins with us," did he find his voice.

He stared at the empty, backward-facing seat devoid of baby bassinet. "A bad strange or..."

"Not necessarily," she murmured. "Just different—A notable absence eased by the knowledge we'll be home with them tomorrow."

Everett cringed, second-guessing his plans for keeping the honeymoon a secret. However, after deep contemplation, he held firm on not wanting to spoil the upcoming reveal. "Are you anxious—about visiting Mason and Myles?" He asked in an attempt to gently divert the conversation.

"Yes," Iris said without hesitation.

He tightened his hold on her hand, his fingers intertwining with hers. "What are you most nervous about?" He asked, dreading her answer for reasons he didn't want to entertain for any length of time.

She held silent, prompting him to look at her instead of focusing on the tufted upholstery's subtle green paisley pattern in front of them. "I don't know if I'm going to feel grief, anger... or..." Iris's voice faltered, and she heaved a sigh, hesitating before quietly admitting, "Going with you—twice now to Elyria's—"

"It isn't easy," he murmured, nodding.

"Precisely, and I'm worried I'll make you uncomfortable."

His stomach clenched as he studied her. "Because that's been your experience?"

"To an extent," Iris murmured. She turned to look out the window and added, "It's difficult watching someone you deeply care about grieving and-and pining for a lost love."

Goosebumps erupted, and prickles danced across Everett's skin at her subtle declaration of affection. "I won't deny I miss Pegleg and grieve for what could have been if she hadn't... if things had gone differently and she was still alive."

"I know. And I don't expect you to. I'd be concerned if you didn't... because it's the same for me—"

"But along with all that," Everett rushed to say, wishing she'd look at him instead of the scenery, "comes the realization no amount of wishing could have—" He paused and shook his head. "I don't want to change what's happened."

Iris slowly turned to him, hesitating before softly saying, "Even though you'd have the woman you love more than anything beside you right now?"

She already is, his soul whispered to his heart. Which only heightened his anxiousness. Because from the moment they'd met, he'd stood on the brink of losing her. And he'd be a fool to forget Iris had mentioned she'd planned to disappear after visiting Mason's grave.

"Did I tell you I called the florist and ordered a bouquet?" Iris said when he failed to reply, her voice husky and threaded with sadness. He could only imagine what she'd interpreted his silence to mean.

"I chose the one near the cemetery, so we won't have to drive out of the way," she continued, staring at her lap while fidgeting with her cuffs. "I'll even be able to show you the house where we lived."

Everett cleared his throat to dislodge the lump of emotion stuck there, meaning it when he said, "I look forward to it."

Iris's gaze flew to his, her brow puckering in a delicate frown. "You do? You're not dreading—"

"Why would I?" He gently interrupted, brushing his thumb across her knuckles. "It's all part of what makes my wife the wonderful, caring, and beautiful woman she is."

Her cheeks flushed a pretty shade of pink, and her eyes sparkled with several emotions that increased his frantic heartbeat. "That's a lovely compliment," she murmured, smiling.