thirteen reasons why

letter 10

Mom -

I love you. You're amazing and strong and beautiful and I'm sorry. You wouldn't listen to me when I told you I had a problem. Your exact words were,

"If you want therapy we can get you it but I don't think you have a problem. Apparently every teenager has depression now adays."

That hurt me. You still don't care. When you told dad I cut your words were, "I'm beyond pissed." You should give me support and instead of yelling at me you should love me because if I hurt myself I probably already have enough on my plate, wouldn't you think?

I guess not.

I hope you miss me because I miss you too. I love you so much and want to thank you for everything that you have done for me. Thank you so much for letting me go to concerts of people that mean a lot to me. Thank you for putting up with my bullshit for thirteen years.

Mike -

I guess cutting and Sui... Is still unacceptable? I guess it's too late to stop me now.

You told me one time, in front of the hospital because you were about to admit me as an official crazy person, "if you want to fucking cut don't be pathetic and cut horizontally. Cut fucking vertically because they can't stitch that shit up."

I guess you figured that's what I did when you found my body from all the blood and the marks there. It's true, I did. But I overdosed first.

Thanks for the ideas, Mikey.

Thanks for making mom pick you over me every single time.

Thanks for favoring your perfect little angels over me.

Thanks for making me feel worthless.

Thanks for giving me your daughter who cared for awhile but then stopped because she had better things to do than talk to me.

Thanks for the memories, even though they weren't so great.

Now isn't the time for FOB references but it's true.

Now you won't have to put up with all this shit that is called Britt.

Both -

I don't even care if you give me a funeral or not.

Not many people care about me so it wouldn't be intelligent to waste all that money for maybe four people to come.

Forever Gone,
your daughter/stepdaughter.