The ungodly incorrect quotes full of spelling mistakes and crackshit whores

I don't remember what I did and didn't put in here..lmao

"YEAH YOU WANT MORE ASS POPSICLE?!"

"Wait what do you mean collars are common where im going?! ARE YOU TRAFFICKING ME?!"

"I witnessed a fly rubbing its hands together. The small faint buzzes of "Mweh heh heh's" I heard were mildly concerning. But it was too late as the fly had already taken the moldy cheese."

"You compound complex built whore-"

"I have bird shit. On my face."

"Suck it like you suck my c-"

"WHAT-"

"Candy. Candy, its candy. THIS IS PG13!"

"No, thats what you named your dick."

"So its a name?"

"No, its to spite him."

"I only have one voice in the front of my head and its making it hard for me to keep my will to live."

"Stab me and twist the fucking knife."

"No, i think i got the wally treatment and my dick go doki doki"

"Im not a monster wearing human skin!"

"Then what are you?"

"I-...you got me there!"

"Haha, yeah, see what I did there? Cmon, get in the car buddy."

"Haha, yeah, yeah you got me."

"Don't take me comforting you as me liking you, I literally broke your leg, killed your friends and kidnapped you. I'm just tryna make sure you- you don't have a literal panic attack, dude! I may be a murderer and a cannibal but I'm not a monster!"

"Do not touch my lashes! They may be fake, but i still slay the runway."

"What are you wearing jake from statefarm!"

"The statefarm uniform?..."

"You mean khakis and a polo shirt, you whore?!"

"Well, that aged not like fine wine but more like spoiled rotten milk!"

"You're learning how to suck dick. Now get on your knees babygirl-"

"I would drink a boiling pot of water fresh off the stove than listen to bye-bye on repeat."

"Even though I like the song..I have to agree-"

"I will care if you become my sugar...daddy."

"Your telling me i didnt sit on santas lap in the mall?..."

"Im very much hetero and not in denial!"

"You're in denial and inlove with you bestfriend."

"Fuck, your right!"

"In this act, im a cannibal! And he's my target...im slowly eating him alive yet keeping him alive...he can't escape me."

"But i couldnt do it- i couldnt do it man!"

*flatline*

"CELEBRATE-"

"I'll call you back at like..2pm."

"No you wont."

"Yeah, your right- mwah, love you."

"NO-"

"Its burning spice cookie."

*silence*

"THE TAKI?!"

"I swear to god if he jerks off thinking about me im gonna kill him."

"What-"

"What?"

"WhAt-"

"WhAT-"

"He blackmailed me and forced me to marry him so he wouldnt tell my secret."

"Whats your secret?"

"BITCH I DONT KNOW-"